US News & World Report recently noted that gastric bypass surgery not only cuts your appetite but also might reduce your desire for high-fat foods. Over the years, I've had friends who have suffered through gastric bypass or lap band procedures. They've all shed weight as if they had made a pact with Satan -- quickly and what appears to be easily.
People applaud their weight loss and congratulate them on how thin they've become and how good they look.
I don't like cheating and I don't like short cuts, especially (at least) when it comes to such a big thing (pun totally intended).
My weight has yo-yoed during the years. I've been normal weight, thick, chubby, and obese. When I was at my heaviest, 250 pounds, I did the unthinkable. I cut my calories to less than 500 per day and began exercising two hours daily. Guess what? I also lost weight as if I had a pact with "he who must not be named." (Oh, wait, that's Lord Voldemoort; I mean the other guy.)
It was difficult, especially at first. But every day I -- and my will -- grew stronger. And after three months (in which I lost 80 pounds), I was very, very proud of myself.
How can I be proud of someone who takes the easy route? Someone who decides that having a surgeon cut them open and rearrange or modify their insides is easier than eating less and exercising more? It's just lazy.
And if you're too lazy to cut calories and exercise, you don't deserve to be skinny.
Before I get a ton of comments about how some people are so obese they don't have a choice -- chill, please. You're the type of person who enables drug addicts and criminals. I have the Learning Channel. I've seen those shows about the heaviest people on the planet, including Manuel Uribe from Mexico, who weighed more than 1,000 pounds and was dubbed "the Fattest Man on Earth." He began losing weight by exercising and cutting down on eating. Sure, his exercise consisted of doing arm circles while lying in bed, but it burned more calories than lying there eating tacos.
And if the fattest man on Earth can say no to food and yes to exercise, so can all of the self-indulgent, overweight, spineless jellyfish who take the easy way out.
Follow Short Order on Facebook and Twitter @Short_Order.