Some men like to get on social media and complain about how easy it is to succeed as a female DJ.
It's as if having tits means you must have special powers, although the implication is actually that women don't have to be good to land gigs. Wow, fellas, listen to yourselves once in a while.
We here at Crossfade wish to dispel those kinds of comically sexist myths. And that's why we're celebrating Miami's ten best female DJs.
See also: Miami's 25 Best Electronic Music Acts
10. Jessie Andrews
Andrews is a woman of many talents. Sure, she first made her name in the adult industry, but her crossover into the house music scene is anything but labored. The Miami-born disco lover speaks openly about her teenage love for places like Treehouse and how our sinful city helped mold her addiction to good beats. She splits her time in L.A., but she's over here playing gigs at the Garret, Bardot, and the like at pretty regular intervals. She's been tapped by Blood Orange, Duke Dumont, and Drake for remixes, so any haters can suck a tit.
9. Bonnie Beats
Not all girls are ass clappers. Some women are just beat trappers. Such is the case with Bonnie Beats. Her mega-live hype mixes will have your girl twerkin' from start to finish. But she's no one-note sister. She can get as chill and groovy as the rest of 'em. She delivered some slick poolside beats for Mercedez-Benz Fashion Week, and she helps expose partiers from all walks of life to the vogue scene as one of the organizers of the Catwalk monthly at the Garrett. She's also in an adorable AT&T commercial about Spanglish. Whatever the hat she's wearing, Bonnie Beats gives 110 percent. Look out for her rockin' the opening slot for many of Bardot's big events.
See also: Five Signs You Might Be a Shitty DJ
8. Jessica Who
Her name is kind of punny for unrecognizability, but any real party freak in town knows exactly Who she is. She's been a go-to opening act for huge names in huge clubs, from GTA to Q-Tip, from Grand Central to LIV. She aims to please, and she's not just a pretty face putting on a show. The girl can really mix, obviously. She's versatile, able to warm up the crowd no matter who's headlining the marquee, and that's exactly what you want in a DJ.
7. Carli Nicholas
Variety is the spice of life, and Carli Nicholas has a cabinet of seasonings ready to explode. With funk as her common denominator, she'll mix from house to disco, electro, hip hop, even a bit of post-punk vibe. Her sounds are perfect for summer, which is why you can catch her spinning at the Modrian on Saturdays. She also lets loose at Wood Tavern and can be seen at Slap & Tickle Tuesdays from time to time. Because she is ambitious, she's teamed up with an Australian DJ for the intercontinental DJ project Dances with Wolves. Sickest penpal ever.
6. Ess and Emm
This Canadian-turned-Miami outfit gives us two lady DJs for the price of one. Their delicious mix of disco hits nu and old will have the shyest wallflower blooming to the beat. Sasha and Michelle cleverly weave indie faves with hidden gems for a style that's always entertaining and lighthearted. These mixes are for drinking more than thinking, which is why they're in such high demand for Miami's most fashionable events, from Soho Beach House to underground soirees. Their era-less sound was big at the Vagabond before its doors closed, but you can still catch them at Set on the regular, and wherever else hyper-cool kids congregate.
5. Tracy Young
This Young one was a national DJing celebrity back when most of the women on our list were still busy learning to walk. She's a legend in Miami and has been tapped for her remixing skills by none other than Beyonce, Cher, Britney Spears, Kelly Clarkson, Katy Perry, and more. She DJ'd Madonna's wedding, and that should tell you something. Her infamous New Year's Day parties give party professionals a chance to celebrate at Mansion without having to deal with the SoBe mess of New Year's Eve. When she's not touring the country, she can be heard making the rounds from Miami to Wilton Manors.
See also: EDM's Five Biggest Hacks
We have a special place in our heart for spooky music, and Uchi's dark techno style is Michael Myers Halloween creep meets Hal 9000 futuristic doom beats. She found her voice on her WVUM radio show, Dead Air. She describes her style as "dark voids, shimmering lights, and the sound of the space between," and she continues to hone her craft with Dead Air Spaceship through klangbox.fm, Sundays from 4 to 6 pm. She's not the fastest mixer in the West. Her builds are long, but they're worth it. Her dedication to track selection and mood translates well into mixes that truly move the listener. She's serving space-age sex-ghoul deep dish, and we're quickly falling in love with her daring edge. Look out for her sets at Electric Pickle.
Maybe you're sick of hearing us talk about how cool Catwalk is, but we don't really care. Gooddroid has a really neat thing going with that monthly vogue celebration, and she deserves the respect. She's also the head of Loveless Records and as such has been turning out ill tunes on an international level since 2011. She's a real bass freak, a fact reflected in her mixes, but her diverse taste in style means the bass comes in as many forms as possible. She ventures to be bold and harsh where others may shy away, but we think it pays to be edgy.
2. Ms. Mada
It ain't easy being the only girl in a boys club, but Ms. Mada makes her residency with underground house heroes LINK look like a picnic. As part of the highly-regarded party crew, she can regularly be caught spinning records at Story, Electric Pickle, Treehouse, and more. Her smooth mixing style was recently spotlighted by Radio Ibiza Dance Station in Italy, garnering the Phillipino-born DJ some international attention. If you love submarine-level deep sets, Ms. Mada is the spinstress that'll steal your heart, but she's not really what the "turnt up" crowd is looking for. Only real deep tech lovers need apply.
1. Laura of Miami
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In the local music scene, Laura is kind of a legend. She made quite the impression with her radio show Vamos a La Playa during her reign as queen of WVUM. Today, the Monday evening special continues via klangbox.fm 2 to 4 pm, dutifully delivering sleek mixes of everything from catchy disco to groove-worthy house and rockin' indie dance vibes. She doesn't only mix via the Interwebz. Follow her on twitter @lauraofmiami to find out where she'll show up next. Her catalog of tracks is as wide as it is diverse. Because of her continued contributions to the Miami scene and her dizzying array of danceable tracks, were giving the woman who put the city in her name the top spot. We're proud to have you.
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Follow Kat Bein on Twitter @KatSaysKill.