Waterworld? Five Miami Landmarks That'll Be Better Underwater

From gorgeous underwater structures to deep-sea cityscapes, tales of Atlantis have long enchanted us. Local, real-world projects, such as Key Largo's Christ of the Abyss statue and the proposed Reefline underwater sculpture park, are already capitalizing on the allure of submerged art and artifice.

That said, if the past weekend was any indication, Miami won't have to wait long to become its own underwater attraction — and at no extra cost! An unnamed tropical disturbance crossing southern Florida led to viral videos of street-surfing dogs and avenue-paddling residents, even a drenched clubgoer sliding down the hood of stalled BMWs as if it were a waterslide.

Between climate change and sea-level rise, Miami's status above ground is teetering. But rather than dwell on the negative, New Times compiled a list of five Miami landmarks that will be better underwater than they ever were on dry land.

Let's dive in.

Wynwood

Once a go-to spot for mural appreciation and artistic expression, Wynwood has more recently been plagued by rising rents and developer interests choking out the homegrown art scene. Plus, the traffic is abysmal and the constant threat of getting hit by a slingshot can ruin the outdoor experience.

If Wynwood happened to become completely submerged, however, all the traffic woes and overpriced açai bowls would vanish. The neighborhood is basically an underwater art park in need of a few feet of water.

Tired: walking mural tours.

Wired: Exploring outdoor art via paddleboard.

Miami Marine Stadium

Once a storied venue for concerts, boat shows, and water racing, Miami Marine Stadium was long ago abandoned to the elements. Civic leaders have tried for years to revitalize the stadium, to no avail. Truth be told, one deluge of biblical proportions is exactly the kick in the pants this once-glorious arena needs.

The stadium was intended as a marine attraction. What's more marine than allowing Miamians to experience it underwater? An eyesore whose sole function is to serve as a hipster backdrop for influencers' photoshoots would become a can't-miss spot for snorkel and scuba enthusiasts as the marine critters take over.

Venetian Causeway

When they were built, the Venetian Causeway and the accompanying Venetian Isles project were meant to bring the Old World aesthetic of Italy to South Florida. But what if the popular causeway were to become even more like Venice?

In the underwater future, the Venetian Causeway could truly channel the Italian city of canals it was named after, allowing the well-heeled to swap their Teslas for gondolas to ferry them across Biscayne Bay. In lieu of Italian arias, Miami's gondoliers would deliver their own renditions of Bad Bunny and Pitbull.

Bayside Marketplace

With its chain stores and suitcase-toting tourists, Bayside Marketplace is no one's definition of a cool landmark. Underwater, however, even the letters that spell out its name would draw a crowd, and the sunken shops would transmute into an intricate artificial cave system. The dining options, too, would benefit from submersion — though topping Bubba Gump Shrimp Co. isn't exactly a high bar.

Miami City Hall

Though it currently sits on dry land, Miami City Hall on Dinner Key has already been taken over by sharks and piranhas, albeit the subspecies that wear suits and sit on big comfy chairs. An under-the-sea city hall isn't at all far-fetched. Future politicians can wade into commission meetings via their billionaire tech oligarch donors' superyachts and sign a deal to build a floating soccer stadium instead of affordable housing or solutions to mitigate sea-level rise.