Top 5 Reasons To Work In a Strip Club Kitchen

Short Order has always thought highly of strip club kitchens. Not necessarily the food they produce, just the fact that there is an entire staff of people working them whose job it is to cook at a place where girls dance naked for money.

Late last year we brought you our first ever South Florida strip club dining guide. Today, we're breaking down our top 5 reasons to work in a strip club kitchen.

Each number corresponds to a story told to us by Amire, currently a line cook in two high-volume Brickell restaurants. Amire entered the world of professional cooking in a strip club kitchen at the age of 18. Throughout his career he has worked in the kitchens of Goldrush, Pink Pony, and Solid Gold.

5. It's a crazy atmosphere. The first week that I started working at ******, the manager came to the kitchen and told me to go to the VIP, that the chick that had just won the sausage swallowing contest was back there waiting for me.

4. Camaraderie.They sent me in with this girl one time and the

manager said "bet you can't last two minutes." And then everybody

started saying it, and I was all like nah it takes me 20 or 30 minutes

when I'm getting... And so I go in and this girl gave the most

amazing... So I'm like trying as hard as I can not to... and I

finally do and I run out and check my stop watch and it's been 2

minutes and 37 seconds and I'm just feeling so good I yell out: "Ha! I

told you motherfu**ers I'd last more than 2 minutes." Those were the

best times of my life.

3. Great place to celebrate a holiday. I was working Halloween one year and the club was dead empty. It was me, two other dudes and seven chicks. There were three dancers, the bartender, the hostess, and two cocktail waitresses. We got bored and went in the VIP and all seven girls got on the floor and started eating each other out in a big circle and finger fu**ing each other.

2. Fringe benefits. I was 18 when I started working at *****. At that point that was the first strip club I had ever been to. Everybody loved me cause I was young and my girl was pregnant, and I was about to be a father. I dressed like a thug, but not too much, and I was nice to the girls. Like not too much of bothering them, but still cool with them and made them laugh. I was always a flirt. There was this one white girl named Tennessee. She had a big fat ass and a tattoo on her back that said "Prime Time." She came back in the kitchen one day and said, "You ready for this?" and we just started doing it right there. It was on a table out in the open and anybody could have walked in at anytime... anytime. She stops in the middle and goes like, "Oh my god! What are we doing?"

1. Learn from other people's mistakes. I seen this one dude come

in one night with about ten grand in an envelope. He was there by

himself, and flossing for the girls. He was drunk as hell. He went to

the VIP and about ten girls went back there and rushed him. They took

his whole knot. He came running out and told the bouncers, but they

were in on it, so they threw him out the club and body slammed him on

the concrete. Then he called the cops. When they finally showed up, he

was the one that got arrested. So not only did he get jacked for 10

grand and then body slammed, he went to jail that night. Hah!

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Jacob Katel
Contact: Jacob Katel