Miami New Times is turning dirty 30 this year, meaning we're just as sexy but can impart something like sagely advice on you younguns. Which is why celebrating our yearly picks for the top places, people, and things in the Magic City is especially pertinent this year. At the Best of Miami Party, you'll not only be introduced to the crème de la crème, but also get free booze, bites, and entertainment courtesy of the crazy young aunt of South Florida newspapers. Let's hope we don't end the night crying under our birthday crown. 8 p.m. Thursday at the Phillip and Patricia Frost Museum of Science, 1101 Biscayne Blvd., Miami; 305-571-7579; newtimesbestofmiami.com. Tickets cost $50.
Remember the days when simply naming the stuff you were looking at was considered entertainment? Walter Wick made a living off creating those kinds of pastimes in his books Can You See What I See? and I Spy. The exhibit "Walter Wick: Games, Gizmos, and Toys in the Attic" gathers the author's collection of photographs and large-scale models that inspired his books and fueled his passion for optical illusions, puzzles, and games. An opening reception for the exhibit, beginning at 5:30 p.m., will include a lecture from Wick himself, who is now a full-time Miamian. 5:30 p.m. Thursday to September 24 at the Lowe Art Museum, 1301 Stanford Dr., Coral Gables; 305-284-3535; lowemuseum.org. Admission is free.
In case your engagement with Miami-Dade restaurants is still limited to Coral Gables, Brickell, and South Beach, you should get to know CityPlace, the new dining, shopping, and entertainment mecca of Doral. The CityPlace Progressive Dinner Tour will introduce the uninitiated to the city's new cluster of restaurants and bars with a kind of sampling crawl across its concentrated grounds. After stops at CinéBistro, Icebox Cafe, the Rusty Bucket, and Sloan's Ice Cream, you'll be waddling to closing drinks at Cabo Flats with a newfound appreciation for what West Dade offers. 6 p.m. Thursday at CityPlace Doral, 8300 NW 36th St., Doral; 305-205-9322; doralchamber.org; cityplacedoral.com. Tickets cost $47.
No matter how you've been spending Pride month, the Out in the Tropics LGBTQ Performing Arts Series is the perfect way to round out 30 days of queer celebration. Performances from flamenco-dancer-turned-songstress La Shica, cabaret and drag artist Joey Arias, Cuban hip-hop duo Krudas Cubensi, and author Antonio Orlando Rodriguez are the bulk of a program dedicated to LGBTQ themes of sexuality, gender identity, and politics. The three concerts will take place in the Gleason Room at the Fillmore (1700 Washington Ave., Miami Beach), and Rodriguez's reading with fellow authors Grettel Trujillo and Michael Gil will be hosted at Miami Beach Botanical Garden (2000 Convention Center Dr., Miami Beach). 8:30 p.m. Thursday, Friday, and Saturday and 2 p.m. Sunday; 305-673-7300; fundarte.us. Admission varies by event.
The folks at Matador Room assure us that the age-old debate is over: Pineapple and pizza do go together, and it's scrumptious. That's why they're pairing a Spanish ham pizza with a fancy pineapple cocktail and inviting everybody over to try it. It's the beginning of the restaurant's monthly series Pineapples & Pizza, which will offer live music and off-menu pairings of exotic pizzas and specialty cocktails. Naysayers are encouraged to bring a friend to share, although it's doubtful you'll be able to deny the deliciousness. 9 p.m. Thursday at Matador Room, 2901 Collins Ave., Miami Beach; 786-257-4600; matadorroom.com. A pairing costs $35.
Aside from being an exceptional storyteller, Roxane Gay has no shortage of courage and insight, as is evidenced by her memoir, Hunger. Tackling racial and gender inequality while weaving in personal narrative and penetrating commentary has been Gay's claim to fame, but her latest book takes aim at an issue for many women: weight and body image. At this event, she'll talk with Isis Miller, a writer and activist in Miami, about representation, rebellion, and black-girl magic. To attend the event, you must buy a copy of Gay's memoir, a purchase you won't regret. 8 p.m. Friday at Books & Books, 265 Aragon Ave., Coral Gables; 305-442-4408; booksandbooks.com. Admission is free with the purchase of Hunger for $27.81.
In 2009, before we knew we wanted him, Pitbull told us we did (and on Calle Ocho no less). The rest is Miami history. But a decade earlier, a pretty Spanish crooner named Enrique Iglesias brought the U.S. to its knees by asking us — en español — to dance, which pretty much blew everybody's mind, at least outside of South Florida. Now the two Latin music legends are coming together for what the rest of the nation probably thinks is Miami's wet dream: Enrique Iglesias and Pitbull live in concert. Maybe there'll be a shower of panties onstage, maybe not, but short of Selena or Gloria Estefan, this is Latin-crossover history. 7:30 p.m. Friday at American Airlines Arena, 601 Biscayne Blvd., Miami; 786-777-1000; aaarena.com. Tickets cost $35 to $751.
Few modern-day punk bands have enjoyed a career as steady and lucrative as Rise Against. Eight studio albums into a 15-plus-year career and they've still got kids shaking their fists and screaming along. Right off the release of Wolves, the Chicago band will perform with alt-metal mainstays the Deftones. There's plenty to shake your fist at these days, so maintain a healthy outlet for your rage through this concentrated dose of hardcore. 6:30 p.m. Friday at Bayfront Park Amphitheater, 301 Biscayne Blvd., Miami; 305-358-7550. Tickets cost $20.50 to $133 via livenation.com.
Whether you're a baseball fan or not, no one will argue if you say beer and a ball game go well together. Some say a few brews are needed to endure the boring sport. Others say suds are the perfect complement to America's favorite pastime. Whatever your opinion, Beerfest at the Clevelander in Marlins Park is a good idea. Get there before the game, sample international and domestic beers, and then sit back and enjoy a buzz with your ball game. This weekend, the Marlins will play the Cubs, but the winner probably won't matter as much as the little sampler cup you'll get to take home. 2 p.m. Saturday at Marlins Park, 501 Marlins Way, Miami; marlins.com/specialevents. Admission costs $45 to $65.
A week at space camp was the coolest thing you could score as a kid. But your parents were broke, so now you're a grown-ass person with the same need of some otherworldly learning. The Frost Museum of Science is here for you. Through interactive and multimedia activities, you can learn about the astronaut life through the museum's exhibition "Space: An Out-of-Gravity Experience," developed in partnership with NASA. You might not be able to float like Scott Kelly, but you can learn about how he ate and slept during his year in space. 9 a.m. Saturday at the Phillip and Patricia Frost Museum of Science, 1101 Biscayne Blvd., Miami; 305-434-9600; frostscience.org. Admission costs $23.80 to $28.
The ballroom scene empowers. It offers gay and queer kids of color the platform to express themselves through fashion, music, and dance. Kiki competitions are the Olympics of originality and promise a safe haven for some of the fiercest but most vulnerable talents. Loveless Records' Gooddroid, DJ Bonnie Beats, and Morph Atlanta's Jsport will provide the music for Catwalk: A Night of Vogue, a back-to-basics and open-to-all affair. Prizes will be awarded for best vogue performance, best virgin vogue, best runway, best face, and best-dressed. 11 p.m. Saturday at TBC Autonomy, 229 NE 65th St., Miami. Admission costs $5 presale via residentadvisor.net and $8 at the door.
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If you're a South Florida death-metal fan, you're already familiar with the Hoffman brothers. If you're not, the Summer Death Kvlt Festival will educate you. Lose yourself in heavy headbanging with Amon — the brothers' latest outfit — Caveman Cult, Carrion Curse, the Glorious Death, and Chicago band Hellfire Death Cult. 7 p.m. Saturday at Churchill's Pub, 5501 NE Second Ave., Miami; 305-757-1807; churchillspub.com. Admission costs $12 to $15.
Sometimes downward dog just ain't enough. You need something to spice up your yoga practice. G. Fajardo Art Gallery has just the thing: Glow in the Dark Yoga. Add some black-light-enhancing body paint and a couple of glasses of coconut water or vino to regular yoga, and you have a whole new acrobatic adventure. The admission price includes mat rental and beverages, so simply bring that bod in need of stretching and ready to be made into a work of art. 6:30 p.m. Saturday at G. Fajardo Art Gallery, 1639 W. Flagler St., Miami; facebook.com/ChiniYoga. Admission costs $20 to $30 presale and $25 to $35 cash at the door.
Sometimes you just want to go to the bar and grab a beer. Other times, you crave a night with a little more stimulation. Moon Canvas offers a full-on nightlife experience, complete with music and art in a futuristic setting. This week, the company is promoting local artists Richie Hell and Puma & Harry at Bardot. Local world-fusion musician Hell recently released his debut EP, Black Mambo, on Unlock Recordings. Puma & Harry is a Miami-based, Venezuelan DJ duo that'll soon launch a vinyl-only record label. There will be dance music and art for all kinds of desired stimulation, and beer to boot. 10 p.m. Saturday at Bardot, 3456 N. Miami Ave., Miami; facebook.com/mooncanvasmiami. Admission costs $5.
In 2017, we, as a people, really need to learn what self-care is and how to do it. This weekend, the Wynwood Yard will devote an entire day to feeling healed at the Whole and Healthy Wellness Festival, which will present practitioners, teachers, and mind-body wellness experts. The fest includes free yoga and exercise with Lululemon and DJs spinning tunes. You can learn to pickle just about anything at a fermenting veggies session led by an expert from the Yard's Radiate Apothecary. There will be other instructive workshops and discussions, as well as healing therapies such as cranial sacral and acupuncture. Bring the kids to play, and get your body in line with your values. 11 a.m. Saturday at the Wynwood Yard, 56 NW 29th St., Miami; thewynwoodyard.com. Admission is free.
From singing "Baby Love" with the Supremes to crooning "I'm Coming Out" solo, Diana Ross has taken sweet melodies to their max. The Queen of Motown is the original diva of pop music. "Ain't No Mountain High Enough" to stand between her and musical immortality. So be sure to catch Ross and her endless hits at the Arsht Center this weekend. 7:30 p.m. Sunday at the Adrienne Arsht Center for the Performing Arts, 1300 Biscayne Blvd., Miami; 305-949-6722, arshtcenter.org. Admission costs $51 to $115.
The gorgeously manicured gardens at the Morikami Museum are more than eye candy: The institution aims to educate South Floridians about the connection between the Sunshine State and Japan. After 40 years of succeeding at its mission, the museum has reason to celebrate. For the Mori Turns Forty Anniversary Celebration, you can enjoy a musical performance, 10 percent off at the museum shop, a time capsule, and discounted admission if you bring three friends. At the very least, you can appreciate the opportunity to get a little Zen in your life. 10 a.m. Sunday at Morikami Museum and Japanese Gardens, 4000 Morikami Park Rd., Delray Beach; 561-495-0233; morikami.org. Admission costs $15 per person or $40 for a group of four.
Sometimes it seems that comedy on the ground in this town is staying afloat on the backs of the culture-makers of Yo Miami. For Miami Comedy Mondays at 305 Brews, they're bringing together not only comedy and beer but also food and music. Danny Miami Reyes has curated and will host the laugh fest while you guzzle $2 MIA craft beers, chomp on tacos, try not to pee in your pants, and keep comedy alive. 8 p.m. Monday at 305 Brews, 3535 NE Second Ave., Miami; yo-miami.com. Admission is free.
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Seventy years after Jackie Robinson played his first Major League Baseball season, racism is still rampant in sports. If it's difficult to wrap your brain around how that could be, check out A Long Way From Home, a documentary chronicling the times of the pioneering black and Latino players who followed Robinson. The director of Muhammad Ali: Made in Miami and Havana House, Gaspar González, interviews James "Mudcat" Grant, Grover "Deacon" Jones, Octavio "Cookie" Rojas, and others and tells their stories on film. Coral Gables Art Cinema will show the film, as well as host a prescreening reception and postfilm Q&A led by the director. 6 p.m. Tuesday at Coral Gables Art Cinema, 260 Aragon Ave., Coral Gables; 786-385-9689; gablescinema.com. Admission is free.
It ain't easy out here for a lady. You're either living single and feeling lonely from time to time or inundated with the intense demands of a family. Pink Wasabi knows the struggle and has put together Aloha Summer!: Ultimate Ladies' Night Out, a Hawaiian-themed party in the elegant Lilt Lounge at the Epic Hotel. The glam night will offer music, beauty and wellness activities, shopping, and libations to whet your palate. So get it together while making new friends, learning beauty tips, and checking out a spectacular view of downtown Miami. 7 p.m. Wednesday at Lilt Lounge, 270 Biscayne Blvd. Way, Miami. Passes are free for shopping or cost $35 for pampering and other perks via wasabiwednesdays.splashthat.com.
Lean In, Sheryl Sandberg's 2013 book about being a woman in business, made a big splash among feminists — and not in an entirely good way. Some readers praised Sandberg for addressing women's culturally learned reluctance to act like a boss in the workplace. Others criticized her neglect of other factors keeping women beneath the glass ceiling, such as racial bias and single motherhood. Now Sandberg is back with a less controversial topic: her personal life. Option B tells the story of Sandberg and her children after the death of her husband. She'll speak about it this week and let readers decide if her guide to working through grief is more effective than her guide to working while female. 7:30 p.m. Wednesday at Miami Dade College, 300 NE Second Ave., Miami; booksandbooks.com. Required purchase of the book to attend costs $25.95.