The Naked Truth About Naked Pizza...
Rotating video display on Naked's walls.
...is that it's not so hot. Since starting up in New Orleans five years ago, the pizza chain has grown bigger; 96 Naked Pizzas are now in development, the number expected to rise to a thousand over the next five years. The latest one recently opened at 1260 Washington Ave. in South Beach.
Naked's big selling point is that the "ancestral blend" crust "contains
up to 10 grains, prebiotic fiber and probiotics for maximum nutrients
and taste." The crust is, in fact, very tasty and crisp, although I
prefer a more puffed dough around the crown. The "real mozzarella
cheese" is fine -- though I'm not convinced many pizza parlors use fake
cheese. "All natural tomato sauce" is where the pie slips. It may be
with "no added sugar or freaky chemicals", but the taste is almost like
that of straight tomato paste. Natural is nice, but none of the
ingredients are organic (according to the store workers), and the meats
not free-range. Kudos for making each pie fresh to order, but still -- this ain't health food.
10-inch pie with basil: $6.50
Want some garlic on top to perk things up? That'll be $1.49 extra. A
few basil leaves too, you say? Another $1.49. All 23 optional toppings
go for $1.49. This makes no sense -- how can you charge the
same for cilantro as for sausage, ground beef, or feta cheese? Luckily
the pies start out reasonably priced: A 10-inch is $4.99; 12-inch is
$5.99; 14-inch is $6.99.
Perhaps the solution is to get one of Naked's fully dressed pizzas --
same aforementioned sizes range from $12.99 to $16.99, and feature
preselected garnishes such as chicken and onion with hickory-smoked BBQ
sauce. If you're allergic to gluten, you can order a gluten-free rice
flour crust (medium size only; $9.99 sans toppings). Only other items
are spinach salad and mozzarella/cheddar breadsticks -- the
It should probably be mentioned that this is a take-out place -- no seats or stools or counters to eat at. You can order online or by calling 305-809-8595.
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