Tha Alkaholiks on Buying Drinks: "If She Fat, Just Get Her a 40 Oz."
Drinkin' that firewater
Tha Alkaholiks just want you to get drunk and have a good time. Maybe smoke some weed and let the music hit you. Then scream, yell, and throw your hands in the air.
It's what they've been promoting since the early '90s, when their good-time, house-party hip-hop took over all of L.A. County, then the country, and the world.
And soon, Tha Liks will be wrapping their Clash of The Titans tour at The Stage Miami.
We caught up with their DJ and producer E-Swift. Here's what Swift has to say about getting too drunk, mixing weed and liquor, and fans of who are police.
Crossfade: Favorite beer?
DJ E-Swift: My favorite beer right now is Shock Top. It used to be 40oz Olde English man, then I grew up. Then I got more sophisticated.
Best chaser for shots?
Favorite mixed drink?
Ima go with,ooh, ima go with ima go with uuh. Ciroc and Pineapple. I order it just like that. I don't even know what to call it.
Drunkest you've ever been?
Awwh, uuh, lets see 1996.....it was at a Loud Records function. All the record companies and all the presidents were there. Free unlimited drinks, and I took way too much advantage of that. I was throwing up all night, and all morning.
Have you ever been too drunk?
Yeah, I been too drunk. That was it. I've never been hospitalized or fell down and injured myself, but I been too drunk than I should have been a few times.
Best drink to buy a girl?
Would be probably uh apple martini, something cute and sweet. But if she fat you can just buy her a forty ounze.
You know those are illegal in Florida. All they have are quarts.
Uh oh, gonna be a problem there. Shiiiiiit...I didn't know about that. That's crazy. You should be able to drink as much of anything as you want. That's alright though. Just buy two quarts you knowmsayin'.
Best drunk munchies?
You gotta have variety. Somethin' sweet, somethin' crunchy. Chips, and some donuts, and some honeybuns, and some licorice.
Best experience with alcohol?
Uuuhmmm, honestly best experience with alcohol was recording in a studio with Ol Dirty Bastard. We was in LA recording "Hip Hop Drunkies" with ODB and it was a great evening, great music was made. That night was all vodka....the biggest bottle you can find on the planet and we finished it before we started recording. No one passed out before the song was over. It was a great evening.
Advice for mixing weed and alcohol?
Yeah just make sure it's some really good weed. That's about it. And don't actually put the weed in the alcohol. Smoke the weed, and drink the alcohol. Don't mix them up and think it's gonna be something.
Ever had a DUI?
Never. Knock on wood. Uhhm. I just never drink and drive. Because I might spill my drink.
Hardest drinking city in the USA?
Miami. I take that back. Las Vegas. They drink all day, all night, walk down the street with liquor. Wake up with liquor. Go grocery shopping with liquor.
Hardest drinking country in the world?
Finland. They get busy. That's all they do. I don't even know if they eat out there. They drunk from the time of babies with a bottle.
Best weed in the country?
West Coast. California all day....always wins all the cannabis cups for the best weed in the world.
What alcoholic beverage would you most want to do a sponsorship deal with?
My first one was with St Ides Malt Liquor. I would like to do that one all over again. Somebody bring St Ides back with all their crazy commercials. I guess I would say Ciroc, they givin' out money over there.
You ever deal with that guy?
Yeah yeah I know Puff. We was on tour with them. He's the one that told me that Biggie was influenced by King Tee, so that was crazy to hear that.
If you came out with your own beer or liquor what would you call it?
It would be called Likwit just like my crew's name. Likwit Beer.
Best drinking album?
Alkaholiks, 21 & Over. Gotta go with that.
Bottle service or parking lot?
Parking lot all day. I'm pre game all the way. Pre game, post game....fuck it, just pull up to the parking lot and get it in. No dress code, no twenty dolla drinks, and you see the chicks first, and when they leave the club, you the first thing they see. Parkin lot pimpin' is the way to go.
Smash the bottle, trash can, or recycle?
Oh I mean,I'ma use a trash can. I used to smash the bottle, but now I'm more worried about legal concerns. I don't take no chances at the bar or in the parking lot. Plus I don't wanna flatten my tires.
Beer pong, flip cup, asshole, or quarters?
Quarters. I'm old school. Quarters is the shit. I play it by myself. I'm already drinkin'. Whether I win or lose, I win. Right now I'm sippin' on a left over hot beer from last night. Tryina get it before the fizz is gone.
Ever met a cop who is a fan?
I have actually. A female police. And she was fine. It was in New Orleans. Shout out to her. She was in uniform bro. And I chopped it up with her. And she was sexy. Then I ended up walking her to the police station. She wanted to get me this calendar she was in. I couldn't wait to see her out the uniform.
Best drunk activity?
Makin' beats, or you know something creative. I don't like to let it go to waste. I be workin' in the studio when I'm drunk or high. I think that's the best option.
Tha Alkaholiks' The Clash of the Titans Tour. With Casual, Cisum Tomorrow featuring Wes Nyle, Salazar, and DDLuxz, plus DJs Heron and Exes. Friday, September 20. The Stage, 170 NE 38th St., Miami. The show starts at 10 p.m. and tickets cost $15 plus fees via brownpapertickets.com. Ages 21 and up. Call 305-576-9577 or visit thestagemiami.com.
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