4

The Flora-Bama Bar: Mullet-Tossing, Bushwhackers and Bikini Contests

^
Keep New Times Free
I Support
  • Local
  • Community
  • Journalism
  • logo

Support the independent voice of Miami and help keep the future of New Times free.

Unlike the rest of America, in Florida, you have go north to go south. More redneck than refined, the rest of the Sunshine State is full of pick-up trucks, Southern twangs and country music. Head north just a few hundred miles, and it's hard to imagine there's a place called Miami.

And despite any lingering South Florida snobbery, there are lots of spots worth visiting elsewhere in the state -- many of which happen to be unforgettable drinking dens. Arguably, the best of the bunch is the iconic Flora-Bama, a mainstay on Perdido Key since the mid-'60s. The bar, half of which sits in Alabama, half in Florida, is also known as the Flo-Bam -- and it's home to mullet-tossing, epic bushwhackers and bikini contests.

What's a mullet toss, you ask? It's where dudes take turns throwing a fish from the Florida side to the 'Bama side. Seriously.

At the Flo-Bam, you can mosey down to the beach and back all day, drink in hand. Proper attire is a bikini and flip flops. Drinks are strong and cheap. What's not to love?

In essence, the Flora-Bama is a sprawling beach shack with an attached circus tent. It's a random maze of rooms, bars, hand-scrawled graffiti, discarded undergarments and nooks and crannies for carousing.

They have live music, Gulf-caught oysters and a package store. They host hurricane parties, polar bear dips and potluck dinners. They have a party bus - and a shuttle service.

Everyone drinks here. From Jimmy Buffett to Warren Buffett. From the janitor to the CEO. From bikers to frat boys. Every age, every race, every demographic. It's the boozy epicenter of the Gulf Coast.

They endured a seriously nasty blow during Hurricane Ivan in '04, but have since reconstructed most of the premises and new additions are a work in progress. It's probably better now than ever before.

Should you make the trek to the Flo-Bam (and believe us, it's worth the trek), here's what you need to know.

Drink a Bushwhacker. It's their signature concoction, a milkshake-esque treat packed with five different liquors. And it's STIFF.

Order some Royal Reds. Arguably the best shrimp in the country, they steam 'em in house. Write your name on the wall/table/floor or whatever else you eyeball a free spot. You can pick up Sharpies in the gift shop, if need be.

Ladies, bring an extra bra and hang it up with the interior collection. This way, a piece of you will be preserved for all posterity. (Try Walmart - because no one needs to be leaving $60 Vicky's lingerie hanging from the ceiling of a wooden shack.) Bring a DD or book a hotel room nearby. Because you're gonna want to drink. A lot. All day. And probably all night.

So for those brave enough to step foot in North Florida and hit up the 'Bama, we wanna hear your stories. And believe us, there will be stories.

Follow Short Order on Facebook, on Twitter @Short_Order, and Instagram @ShortOrder.

Keep Miami New Times Free... Since we started Miami New Times, it has been defined as the free, independent voice of Miami, and we would like to keep it that way. Offering our readers free access to incisive coverage of local news, food and culture. Producing stories on everything from political scandals to the hottest new bands, with gutsy reporting, stylish writing, and staffers who've won everything from the Society of Professional Journalists' Sigma Delta Chi feature-writing award to the Casey Medal for Meritorious Journalism. But with local journalism's existence under siege and advertising revenue setbacks having a larger impact, it is important now more than ever for us to rally support behind funding our local journalism. You can help by participating in our "I Support" membership program, allowing us to keep covering Miami with no paywalls.

We use cookies to collect and analyze information on site performance and usage, and to enhance and customize content and advertisements. By clicking 'X' or continuing to use the site, you agree to allow cookies to be placed. To find out more, visit our cookies policy and our privacy policy.

 

Join the New Times community and help support independent local journalism in Miami.

 

Join the New Times community and help support independent local journalism in Miami.