Music videos are the ultimate promotional tool.
Sometimes they tell a story. Sometimes they bring the concert into our homes. And sometimes they just slam us in the face with superfast editing and more erratic, bright lights than is medically advisable.
Everyone knows the best vids come with a surgeon general's warning. So here are our top ten seizure-inducing music videos. Sorry, epileptics.
10. J-Wow's "O Dedo"
Okay, so maybe this video is more "awesomely trippy" than "hard to watch." But it scores seizure points for great use of color and natural geographic footage. We wouldn't be surprised if one of these natives suddenly started shaking and swallowed his or her own tongue. Note: The use of kaleidoscopic imagery is a theme that we'll see again and again with increased intensity.
9. Rusko's "Woo Boost"
It doesn't take a million dollars to make an awesome music video, just a green screen and some wobbled-out swag. In 2010, Rusko helped change the world with this jam, causing kids everywhere to seize uncontrollably on the dance floor. Oh wait, that's not epilepsy. That's just how you dance to dubstep.
8. Battles' "Tonto"
The lighting in this cave is really throwing us off. But it's the perfect accompaniment to the staccato textures of this classic jam from Battles' 2007 break-out LP, Mirrored. The video was filmed in an abandoned Welsh slate mine and put together by United Visual Artists, a UK-based collective specializing in awesome light installations. So not only is it cool (though dangerous) to watch, but talking about this vid makes you sound more cultured at parties.
7. Gnarls Barkley's "Run"
This isn't the most famous Gnarls Barkley music video. But it does feature Justin Timberlake, plus some awesome black and white stripes that'll melt your face off. Sure, most of the good freakout stuff doesn't start until 2:10. But once it gets going, hold your tongue.
6. Nicki Minaj's "Stupid Hoe"
Hype Williams hates epileptics and Nicki Minaj hates people who look at her like she's ordinary. Put the two together and you get some superflashy ass-candy. It's sexy. But it could kill you.
7. Animal Collective's "Fireworks"
An Animal Collective song (sans visuals) can send people into violent seizures. So just imagine the kind of abnormal brain activity that could be kickstarted by this cornea-scorching "Fireworks" vid. Do not press play!
4. Bear in Heaven's "Reflection Of You"
Epileptics, GTFO! This Bear in Heaven video for "Reflection of You," directed by Wonder Showzen's PFFR, is the point of no return! Your eyes will try to focus on something! But the camera will not stop fucking zooming!
3. Bassnectar's "Vava Voom"
This video is legit for a multitude of reasons. The song is bangin', the all-girl Bassnectar look-alike band is raw, and the visuals will literally scramble your brain into hypnotized mush. And when did Lupe Fiasco become so buff, anyway?
2. Kanye West's "All of the Lights"
This one is just like, duh. Seriously, Hype Williams really hates epileptics. He also totally stole the treatment for this video from the opening sequence from the insane, French psych-porno Enter The Void. All good art is stolen.
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1. Dan Deacon and Jimmy Joe Roche's "Ultimate Reality - Chapter 1"
Wait ... Screw Hype Williams and Kanye West. The best seizure-inducing video ever is this kaleidoscopic hodge-podge of Arnold Schwarzenegger films set to the jarring electronic bleepity-bloop of Dan Deacon's effing brain. The almost seven-minute clip is the first chapter from a DVD that Deacon put together with friend Jimmy Joe Roche, and it's miraculously weird. Just pop on your hard-shell helmet and enjoy!