Ever since yesterday's announcement of a Tupac Shakur sex tape featuring the rapper broing down with Digital Underground bandmates, a blunt, and a blowjob, Crossfade has been going certifiably insane trying to figure out the identity of the anonymous source planning to comercially release this X-rated vid.
To say there are a lot of suspects is an understatement. In his time, Pac burned a lot of Gs and twice as many hos. But from the usual cast of characters in the Tupac Shakur narrative, a few have raced to the front as obvious suspects with diabolical motives.
Check the jump for Crossfade's top five Tupac Shakur sex tape smutspects.
5. Digital Underground's Shock G
AKA Passionate Proboscis
Shock G was Digital Underground's ringleader. But Makaveli was without a doubt the biggest star to come from the troupe's ranks. We always thought Shock was trying to compensate for something with the Groucho nose. And what if it's because he knew Pac's, ahem, dimensions long before we ever could ... Because he's been holding on to the sex tape all these years!
4. Sean Combs
AKA Puff Daddy, P. Diddy, Diddy, and, uh, Swag
No one knows who murdered Tupac or Biggie, and it's not hard to imagine the killings were related. So what if PeeDidz leaked the tape as passive-aggressive retribution for the death of his pal (and biggest cash cow) Biggie Smalls. Plus, Combs has gotta be hating on the yearly release of "new Tupac" as he has long cached his B.I.G. reservoir.
3. Chris Bosh
AKA The Other C. Breezy
When he's not trying to keep up with LeBron and Wade, Miami Heat superstar Chris Bosh is busy being a (suspected) secret celebrity Juggalo. What if he leaked the sex tape?!
2. Digital Underground's Money B
AKA The Real Humpty Hump
Underground MC Money B allegedly appears in the video next to a mid-blowjob Tupac. Maybe he has the rights to the clip because he appears in it?
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1. Suge Knight
AKA Sugie Oogie Oogie
OK, let's cut the crap ... We all know the Tupac Shakur sex tape is just the latest greatest hit from Sith lord of the West Siiide, Suge Knight.