Richie Rich Sings and Struts at Funkshion: Fashion Week Miami Beach

A walk past the boutiques on Ocean Drive would lead anyone to believe South Beach fashion is represented by mannequins with triple-D implants who rock jewel-encrusted Lycra dresses overlaid with skulls and exotic snakes and covered in glitter vomit.

But, lest we give up on Miami fashion and relegate ourselves to the back of the (Brazilian stretchy jeans-sale) line, Funkshion: Fashion Week Miami Beach is setting up tents on the sand at Tenth Street and Ocean Drive to show us the ways of couture, funky pleats, and asymmetrical cuts and wean us off blinged-out-tropical-dress-addiction. Almost all events are open to the public and free with an RSVP. Read on for a schedule of events.

On Tuesday, March 22, Richie Rich will host a kickoff dinner party at

Eden (210 23rd St., Miami Beach; dinner reservations are required). The

former Heatherette designer is known for wild runway shows that featured

drag queens and porn stars as models and turned snobby-New York Fashion

Week-elitism on its head. (We went to one party where hot pink

sunglasses were the requisite invitations that got you in.)

Richie will host the opening runway show, "Villionaire," on Wednesday at 9 p.m. and join local boutique owner Pachi Lake for another show at 10 p.m. That will be followed by an after-party (and, if his notorious New York City-club-kid past is

any indication, that should be the best part).

On Thursday, March 24, Miami International University of Art and Design

students will show collections from 1 to 3 p.m. followed by Italian TV

Moda taping a live presentation of ten Italian designers from 7 to 11


Then on Friday, March 25, Fashion Loves Haiti will spotlight that country's emerging and leading designers from 7 to 11 p.m.

And if you were lucky enough to score sold-out tickets, you can rock

Masquerade Motel, the closing all-day, uber-insane party on Saturday,

March 26, that will feature music by Swedish House Mafia and fashion

shows by Indashio and The Blonds from 2 to 11 p.m.

Who knows? Maybe next

year will be the year SoBe mannequins don natural breasts? Na, those

things are too grotesquely awesome to ever go away.

To get you in the mood for this year's event, check out some action from last year below: 

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Gabriela Garcia