Halloween is coming up, which means one thing: a prime opportunity to steal candy from children, er, send your kids (or your friends' kids) trick or treating. Most likely, they'll return with the "treat" part of the equation, but occasionally things go wrong. Like if they return with one of these.
1. Camel Balls
No, this isn't a humiliating term aimed at skinny jean-wearing males. It's a bubblegum that oozes "extra sour" liquid upon mastication. Hey, at least this camel isn't peddling cigarettes.
2. Collagen Marshmallows
These collagen-infused edible sponges are adorned with a severe warning label, and promise to give you wrinkle-free skin. That, or kill you. We always knew Hello Kitty was evil.
3. Gummy Poo
Unchi-kun, or Mr. Poop, is a beloved Japanese anime character. He's the inspiration behind all sorts of branded merchandise, including this poo-shaped brown gummy candy. Quite adorable, but does it taste like shit?
We Believe Local Journalism is Critical to the Life of a City
Engaging with our readers is essential to Miami New Times's mission. Make a financial contribution or sign up for a newsletter, and help us keep telling Miami's stories with no paywalls.
Support Our Journalism
4. Bacon Gum
Minty breath is overrated. Who wants to make out with a tube of toothpaste when they can devour some hot, sizzling bacon?
5. Spaghetti Worms with Sauce
We don't know what's more off-putting -- the concept of spicy gummy "spaghetti" with an accompanying tamarind-flavored "sauce," or the fact that the candy's spokesperson is a worm named Lucas. Worms, spaghetti, candy...yum.