The Ten Worst Miami-Inspired Halloween Costumes

OMG you guys, did you know that people from Miami are all Botoxed, Spanglish-speaking club kids? Unless they're tourists, who are all cultureless walking sunburns from the Midwest. Or old people, who all wear hilarious old-people clothes like muumuus and knee socks.

Enough already. It's easy to think of Miami as a city full of stereotypes, but anyone who lives here knows that's not true. Distilling the Magic City into a laundry list of cartoonish archetypes isn't just insulting -- it's also boring. And that goes double on Halloween.

We get it -- you're looking for a costume this year that's both local and topical. But dressing as one of these tired Miami caricatures is not the answer. Here's why.

See also: South Florida's Best Haunted Houses: Monsters, Mad Butchers, Midget Wrestlers, and More

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Ciara LaVelle is New Times' former arts and culture editor. She earned her BS in journalism at Boston University and moved to Florida in 2004. She joined New Times' staff in 2011.
Contact: Ciara LaVelle