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Red Bull Doesn't Actually Give You Wings: Collect Ten Bucks in Class-Action Lawsuit

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In what could be the absolute dumbest case to enter our clogged, overworked legal system, Red Bull North America Inc. has settled two consumer class action lawsuits to the tune of $13 million dollars.

Do the two lawsuits filed with the United States District Court Southern District of New York (Benjamin Creathers vs. Red Bull North America Inc. and David Wolf and Miguel Almaraz vs. Red Bul GMBH, Red Bull North America Inc., and Red Bull Distribution Company Inc.) claim that the carbonated beverages cause you to sprout horns like a bull or maybe lead to deranged humans stampeding like angry cattle? Um, that would be silly. These lawsuits are not "frivolous" like that!

They simply have a beef with Red Bull claims that its drinks "give you wings," when, in fact, there have been no verifiable cases of anyone spouting feathers and soaring like an eagle like in those clever ads.

In addition, the lawsuits also have a gripe with the beverage company's claims that sipping one of their drinks "vitalizes body and mind."

In his 20-page lawsuit, Benjamin Creathers, a resident of the Bronx, "who has been purchasing and ingesting Defendant Red Bull's energy drinks since 2002" claims that Red Bull has defrauded the public and continues to "prey upon consumers by promising that, among other things, 'Red Bull gives you wings'" when, in actuality, "there are no scientifically reliable studies in existence that support the extraordinary claims of Defendants, that Red Bull branded energy drinks provide more benefit to a consumer than a cup of coffee."

Personally, I ran a 50-mile Ultramarathon in 2009, fueled only by sugar-free Red Bull and hard boiled eggs. While I didn't grow actual wings, I did manage to run from Marathon to Key West in about 12 hours.

In a nutshell? A guy from the Bronx is suing Red Bull because he didn't become Superman, and everyone in the United States can make a quick buck from it.

Actually, make that ten bucks.

As part of the class action lawsuit, anyone who made at least one purchase of Red Bull products in the United States between January 1, 2002 and October 3, 2014 can file a claim form and receive either a check for $10 or $15 worth of free Red Bull products. Because if one Red Bull doesn't work, why not try several at the same time for a better shot at spontaneous flight?

Red Bull agreed to settle the deceptive marketing class action lawsuit, but denies "any wrongdoing and maintains that its marketing and labeling have always been truthful and accurate."

If you want in on the action, you must file a claim form, either online or by mail, before March 2, 2015. Visit energydrinksettlement.com to download the form.

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