Film & TV

The Catalina, The Penguin Miami Hotels to Star in New, Annoying Reality Series

If you like hotels, boy are you gonna love watching TV this summer!

And if you don't, well, such is the curse of summertime programming.

Reality TV producers, having already brought viewers into the scintillating worlds of taxidermy, antiquing, and transporting large items, are ready to put yet another industry in the spotlight: the Miami hospitality industry.

New series from the CW and the Travel Channel feature rooms for rent in South Beach and beyond. Hey, at least it's a step up from storage auctions.

Hotel Impossible, which premiered last night on the Travel Channel, follows hotel expert Anthony Melchiorri as he travels from one run-down hotel to another, delivering advice in the most obnoxious manner possible. Y'know how Kitchen Nightmares' Gordon Ramsay is kind of a dick, but underneath it all he still seems lovable? Yeah, Melchiorri is just a dick.

But he's a dick on a mission: to fix up the Penguin Hotel on South Beach, and the next week, to fix up Motel New Yorker in MiMo, before he moves on to the next city. We've had a sneak peek at the Miami episodes, so we can bring you this exclusive spoiler about the hotels: They're dirty. And Melchiorri is here to bitch about it. Oh, and to help. The Penguin episode airs April 16, and the Motel New Yorker episode airs April 23, both at 10 p.m.

Not to be outdone, the CW yesterday announced its new series The Catalina, which follows the staff of South Beach's Catalina Hotel as they work all day and party all night. That's all the CW has released about the show so far, but judging from its other programming, we're expecting plenty of teen drama, a handful of vampires, and at least one guest appearance by Tyra Banks. The show debuts May 29.

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Ciara LaVelle is New Times' former arts and culture editor. She earned her BS in journalism at Boston University and moved to Florida in 2004. She joined New Times' staff in 2011.
Contact: Ciara LaVelle