| Comedy |

Nine Un-Sexy "Hey Girl" Ryan Gosling Memes

Keep New Times Free
I Support
  • Local
  • Community
  • Journalism
  • logo

Support the independent voice of Miami and help keep the future of New Times free.

Women need very little to survive: food, water, and high-speed Internet access so they can peruse the gazillion images of Ryan Gosling that float around like meteoroids of pure hot in cyberspace. The ladies have been obsessed with Gosling ever since the release of The Notebook. Hell, those "Photoshopped" abs are even enough to make us overlook his fake Brooklyn accent. And when ladies become loony from the sizzle of sex appeal, they're capable of doing pretty funny things.

Case in point: the Hey Girl Ryan Gosling web meme, which takes pictures of the Drive and Blue Valentine star and inserts captions that always start off with "Hey girl," and end in campy, flirty hilarity written from Gosling's perspective. This particular meme has become so popular that it has sprouted spin-offs like Feminist Ryan Gosling and Hey Girl Teacher.

This is too much power for one mere mortal. Jesus is not amused.

So we at Cultist have decided to diffuse some of this ex- Mouseketeer's glory by creating a few un-sexy Ryan Gosling memes in an attempt to make Gosling a little less drool-inducingly appealing. Can it be done? You be the judge.

Cheap-Ass Ryan Gosling

Creepy Ryan Gosling

Chauvinistic Ryan Gosling

Eunuch Ryan Gosling

Emotionally Needy Ryan Gosling

Hipster Poser Ryan Gosling

TMI Ryan Gosling

Extremely Bad Taste Ryan Gosling

He's Never Going to be Your Boyfriend, Ryan Gosling
Follow Cultist on Facebook and Twitter @CultistMiami.

Keep Miami New Times Free... Since we started Miami New Times, it has been defined as the free, independent voice of Miami, and we would like to keep it that way. Offering our readers free access to incisive coverage of local news, food and culture. Producing stories on everything from political scandals to the hottest new bands, with gutsy reporting, stylish writing, and staffers who've won everything from the Society of Professional Journalists' Sigma Delta Chi feature-writing award to the Casey Medal for Meritorious Journalism. But with local journalism's existence under siege and advertising revenue setbacks having a larger impact, it is important now more than ever for us to rally support behind funding our local journalism. You can help by participating in our "I Support" membership program, allowing us to keep covering Miami with no paywalls.

We use cookies to collect and analyze information on site performance and usage, and to enhance and customize content and advertisements. By clicking 'X' or continuing to use the site, you agree to allow cookies to be placed. To find out more, visit our cookies policy and our privacy policy.


Join the New Times community and help support independent local journalism in Miami.


Join the New Times community and help support independent local journalism in Miami.