That skinny little bitch in the size two cocktail dress is not going to intimidate you anymore, Thelma. Keep in mind that she's probably malnourished and she has no ass. You, on the other hand, are healthy and vibrant with enough curves to get jiggy with the best of them. There is no need for the rail-thin narrow-mindedness that governs much of society and oftentimes pushes you to the sidelines of the party. It's time to unleash the queen of the night. Fuck Sarah Jessica Parker. You are single. You are voluptuous. You know how to party. This evening kicks off a new bash for the overweight, or, as party-goers prefer to be called, full-figured set. Tentatively called "A Ton of Fun" by Eliot Weinstock, the group's founder, the ongoing festivities are meant to draw out a large number of big people who are tired of the discrimination and bias experienced at most clubs. With free drinks and a buffet of chicken wings, pasta, and Caesar salad, can you think of a reason not to go? The party starts at 8:00 p.m. at the Best Western-Thunderbird, 18401 Collins Ave., Miami Beach. Admission is $16. Call 305-653-1969. -- By Juan Carlos Rodriguez
Friday June 27
Weak Constitutions
Forum focuses on lessening liberties
Uncle Sam wants you -- to relinquish your rights. And if you are a Good American, you'll do that for your country. We live in a dangerous world. So if the government suspects you're a terrorist and arrests you on scanty evidence or it taps your phone, what's the big deal? It's not as if you've ever really had any privacy. The U.S.A. Patriot Act of 2001 made that official. Take off those sandals; shave that beard. Try not to look swarthy! Nauseous now? Maybe you should participate in a Community Forum on the U.S.A. Patriot Act and Civil Liberties, taking place at 6:30 p.m. at the Unitarian Universalist Congregation, 7701 SW 76th Ave. Admission is free. Call 305-235-7324. -- By Nina Korman
