Enough of the crowds on South Beach. It's time for some decadent diversions in other parts of town. The Latin influence bleeds into North Miami when coffeehouse-cum-club the Grind (12573 Biscayne Blvd., 899-9979) hosts Descarga, a Latin open-mike night put on by local rock en espanol band ANada? Anyone who can belt it out in Spanish is welcome. The party also goes retro in North Miami on Friday nights when Bermuda Bar (3509 NE 163rd St., 945-0196) hosts a glitter gala with the Afro-clad Seventies band the Polyester Pimps performing soul-stomping, kung-fu fighting dance tunes. The band also adds its Tang touch to the Tuesday ladies night party at Cafe Iguana (8505 Mills Dr., Town and Country Center, Kendall, 274-4948). At the farthest reaches of clubland -- Broward -- alternative haunt Squeeze (2 S. New River Dr., Fort Lauderdale, 954-522-2151) celebrates eight years of existence on Friday, February 28, with a dance, fashion, art, and music extravaganza hosted by DJ Frank Mendez and his Eighties trash tunes funneled in for inspiration.
Amnesia, "Wet and Wild." Step out of the heat on the street and into the frothy foam, where you'll be sure to cool off as temperatures rise, with a wet T-shirt contest at midnight. 136 Collins Ave., Miami Beach, 531-5535.
Groove Jet, "Groove Girl." Eclectic locals gather for mayhem and mischief with resident DJs Carlos Menendez and Chilly spinning musical fun for everyone. 323 23rd St., Miami Beach, 532-2002.
821, "Thursday Cabaret." Mary D's Sappho-esque love riot of dancing, drinking, and cruising -- a juicy wallow at a louche refuge. 821 Lincoln Rd., Miami Beach, 534-0087.
Union Bar, "Latin Night." The Latin masses join forces for some hot and heavy rock en espanol dispensed by DJ Gus. 653 Washington Ave., Miami Beach, 674-7870.
Jimmy Johnson's Three Rings Bar, "Two Year Anniversary." Party it up at this seaside sports bar to benefit the Kidney Foundation of South Florida. 4525 Collins Ave. (Eden Roc Resort), Miami Beach, 674-5539.
Chez Alex. Lounge out as pianist Alex Kozulin plays pop, swing, and jazz standards at his namesake club. 619 N. Atlantic Blvd. (Ramada Inn), Fort Lauderdale, 954-568-3837.
Bash. DJ Marc Sacheli spins the latest and greatest dance music in the main room, while international DJ Roberto Costa pumps out world beats under the stars in the back yard Magic Garden. 655 Washington Ave., Miami Beach, 538-8858.
Spec's Music, "Urbanpalooza." Ten local unsigned bands ranging from acid jazz to hip-hop to reggae converge in Coconut Grove to showcase their talent. 2982 Grand Ave., Coconut Grove, 461-8661.
Kitchen Club. DJ Carlos Saint Germain churns out gothic, dark-wave, and retro tunes. 11220 Biscayne Blvd., Miami Shores, 754-0777.
Splash, "Men Who Prefer Men." Go underground at a deep-house dance party complete with go-go boys and free drinks from 10:00 to 11:00 p.m. -- a party beyond reckoning. 5922 S. Dixie Hwy., South Miami, 661-0917.
KGB, "Hercules." DJ Rad pumps out solid grooves of acid jazz, funk, and soul, too cool for mortal comprehension. 637 Washington Ave., Miami Beach, 535-3063.
Society Hill, "The Dancehall." Get irie with a Jamaican style party so close to real you'll think you need a passport. 627 Washington Ave., Miami Beach, 534-9993.
Trio Nightclub, "Deca-dance." DJ Tre pumps out retro tunes to take you back in time -- with dangerous disco driving in the side room. Cheap drinks and hearty fun. 2660 E. Commercial Blvd., Fort Lauderdale, 954-958-9971.
Le Mystere, "Soiree Gastronomique." You don't have to be a gypsy to enjoy the Spanish sounds of live flamenco dancing with Miguel Mesa and Mara La Gitana. Authentic Spanish food also available. 1334 Washington Ave., Miami Beach, 674-1666.
Cafe Iguana, "Monday Night Boxing." Hinterland amusements for the masses, with rough-and-tumble challenge bouts; a carnival set in a club/restaurant that runs like a well-oiled machine. 8505 Mills Dr. (Town &Country Center), Kendall, 274-4948.
Tobacco Road, "Swamp Boogie." Always, always on Monday you can catch Iko-Iko's acoustic jam and down a Samuel Adams or two or ten. 626 S. Miami Ave., 374-1198.
Doc Dammers, "Happy Hour." Complimentary sushi and cheap sake help de-stress even the busiest executive. Smooth ballads provided by Duo Conclusions. 180 Aragon Ave. (Colonnade Hotel), Coral Gables, 441-2600.
Park Central Hotel, "Songwriters in the Round." Relax and enjoy as national and local talent come together, or showcase your own bad self in the songwriting game at an early open mike. 640 Ocean Dr., Miami Beach, 899-7346.
Ready Bar, "Home Cookin'." DJ Rad serves up a host of special soul and hip-hop flavors for a laid-back locals kind of crowd. 560 Washington Ave., Miami Beach, 534-8847.
Brandt's Break, "Hot Shot." There are no tea and crumpets to be found when Bobby Radical hosts this British music invasion at the too-cool pool hall. 619 Washington Ave., Miami Beach, 531-9661.
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Society Hill, "For a Better World." Cheap drinks for a fun-loving crowd with hip-hop, reggae, and R&B dispensed by DJ Chief. 627 Washington Ave., Miami Beach, 534-9993.
-- By Liz Martinez
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