"No matter what a stripper tells you," Chris Rock once sang, "There's no sex in the Champagne Room." Rock had obviously never been to a strip club here in Miami. As this week's feature on notorious Hialeah strip club Porky's shows, there is most definitely sex in champagne rooms all across this sleazy city.
Keep reading for some of the most insane stories from Porky's court records, including one stripper's claim to having the "prettiest" parts in town.
As told in the feature, Galeota wasted no time turning Porky's into a booming business based largely on prostitution.
"Someone would come to Porky's, see a girl they liked, and ask me: 'Is she good to go?'" Galeota says. "A lot of girls wouldn't usually sleep with guys. A lot of other girls would. Sometimes if you upped the ante, offered her $500, all of a sudden the girl changed her tune."
When Porky's powerful landlord Bill Seidle died in 2008, Florida's Division of Alcoholic Beverages and Tobacco launched an investigation into the strip club.
Court records obtained by New Times show that ABT officials cased the joint from February until May of 2009. They kept a tally of the illicit activities they witnessed: "15 purchases of cocaine, four purchases of MDMA, one purchase of Xanax, one purchase of marijuana, 18 solicitations for prostitution, [and] 20 lewd acts."
"Lewd" isn't the half of it. Dancers with names like Baby Doll, Love, Tipsie, Trixie, and Crème routinely offered to have sex with the undercover cops for as little as $150. That's exactly what the VIP rooms were for, Galeota says. Meanwhile, waitresses fetched customers any drug they requested -- for a price, of course.
But things got much kinkier. According to an ABT investigation, one dancer introduced herself to an undercover agent and immediately "exposed her breasts and began to pass her tongue over the tip of her mammary glands. After finishing, she asked [the agent] if he liked what he saw and advised him that he would charge him a 'very, very fair price' [for sex]."
She then told the agent that it was "his lucky night" because she was "horny" and needed "a good f***."
Some of the strippers admitted to being on Ecstasy while performing at the club. But no drug quite explains what a dancer named Dashana did.
She climbed on top of a detective, "exposed the inner area of her reproductive organ and introduced two fingers into the same," according to a report. She then asked two guys nearby if she had a "beautiful pussy."
When they agreed, Dashana told the cop to pay $400 for the "best pussy he would ever hit."
He probably didn't take her up on the offer. Police surrounded Porky's in the early hours of May 9, 2009 and arrested 18 suspects, including Galeota, several strippers, and most of the employees.
During the bust, they found five grams of weed, a bottle of Viagra, and some mysterious yellow pills. But Galeota's felony drug and prostitution charges were immediately dropped.
Read this week's feature to find out what happened to Galeota when he tried to move his prostitution business to Panama, where prostitution is legal.
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