That blindfolded chick holding the scales just made it rain justice on Rumeal Robinson. The former University of Michigan basketball hero and NBA journeyman-- whose addiction to strip clubs was first exposed by this blog-- has been convicted in Iowa federal court of fraud. The Aventura resident was indicted for spending an illegally-secured $700,000 business loan on sportscars, designer clothing, jewelry, furniture, and our favorite-- a $10,000 machine gun he purchased in Little Havana.
Welcome to South Florida's Blown Fortune Hall of Fame, Rumeal. Have a Cuban cigar. It's crowded in here, we know.
This flash-is-everything region is Mecca for swindlers, conmen, addicts, hard-luck cases, and plain ol' out-of-control ballers. Plus: We grow our own! Let's explore the roster of South Florida's least fiscally responsible.
South Florida home: Weston
Fortune Blown: At least $20 million in NFL salary and post-football business earnings.
Spectacular Fashion Index: 8/10
Details: After upwards of $15 million lost in terrible investments and "between $4 and $5 million" lost in a divorce, Kosar committed bankruptcy last year. Read Dan le Batard's tremendous profile if you want to picture the former gridiron God padding around his empty mansion, holding his teeth in a cup.
We Believe Local Journalism is Critical to the Life of a City
Engaging with our readers is essential to Miami New Times's mission. Make a financial contribution or sign up for a newsletter, and help us keep telling Miami's stories with no paywalls.
Support Our Journalism
South Florida home: Aventura
Fortune Blown: Upwards of $5 Million in NBA salary.
Spectacular Fashion Index: 8.5/10
Details: Robinson committed bankruptcy while still in the NBA, which may have been a first. He spent $20,000 a night at strip clubs, according to his adopted brother. Than he'd have a group of the exotic dancers come back to his place, "get buck-naked, and clean his house for $500 or $1,000 each." He also gave his girlfriend, a former Booby Trap stripper, a $150,000-a-year executive position in his sham company. He even scammed his own adopted mother out of her house.
R. Allen Stanford
South Florida home: Coral Gables
Fortune Blown: $8 billion in investors' cash into his alleged Ponzi scheme.
Spectacular Fashion Index: 8.5/10
Details: The disgraced knight kept a harem of mistresses, owned an island in Antigua, and installed throne toilets-- literally-- in his English-style manse. He also spent at least $20 million trying to spark interest in cricket in Antigua.
South Florida home: Palm Island, Miami Beach
Fortune Blown: An estimated $70 million net worth stemming from his music production.
Spectacular Fashion Index: 9/10
Details: There was the $20 million yacht that he ended up pawning for $600,000. The 13-plus luxury and exotic cars, including a $1.7 million Bugatti Veyron. The $10 million Palm Island mansion. The millions in diamonds and vehicles he bought for girlfriends Lindsay Lohan, Paris Hilton, and Kim Kardashian. Oh yeah, and all those Scarface-esque mounds of cocaine. Meanwhile, his mother told New Times, he abandoned her in near-poverty. Rule number one of being a South Florida scumbag: Screw your mom over.
South Florida home: Palm Beach
Fortune Blown: $50 billion in investors' cash, much of it from the Palm Beach country club set, into his definitely-more-than-alleged Ponzi scheme.
Spectacular Fashion Index: 9.5/10
Details: Um, he's Bernie Madoff. Every time he farts, an elderly couple in Boca loses their savings.