Bachelorette parties are more than strippers, penis cakes, and free tequila shots for the bridal party. They're one last hurrah for the bride-to-be and an excuse for the rest of us single ladies to get blasted in hopes of meeting Mr. Right Now.
And every bachelorette party, much like the one that Crossfade crashed on Friday night at the Dome, has its crazy, borderline ratchet stories, that will leave you with a tiger in your room, asking, "WTF happened last night?"
Here are four you meet at Miami bachelorette parties.
See also: Six Worst Miami Pick-Up Lines, According to the Ladies
"Woo Girls"
A newlywed herself, Josie was constantly making sure our bride's shot glass was full.
"You need to get her drunk!" the blonde bombshell yelled.
"Mine was crazy but fun," she said, remembering her bachelorette party almost two years ago.
"We were, like, 40 girls and we stayed at the Fontainebleau. We partied all night at LIV. At the end of the night, there were feathers all over the hotel.
"Some girls even fell asleep in the lobby, and at the pool the next day, someone threw an inflatable doll at us."
Wooooooooo!
The Shy Girl Chased by a Stripper
It's not every day that you hear of someone getting chased by a stripper.
But meet Kim. A few years ago, she was at a bachelorette party when some nude dude just wouldn't stop stalking her.
"There was a stripper that kept chasing after me because he knew I was shy," she laughed. "I ran, but he just went after me."
Next time, try some pepper spray between his legs, Kim.
Blacked-Out Beauties
Armando Padron was having a drink at the bar with his friend.
"This didn't happen at a bachelorette party, but last night at Red Koi, a girl was celebrating her birthday," the handlebar-mustached man recalled.
"She was angelic. Until she blacked out. Then she started taking random pictures with us," Padron laughed.
OK, well, if her birthday bash is any indication of her eventual bachelorette party, we expect compromising pics with a penis cake and Mr. Right Now.
Our condolences to the future groom.
Single Bachelors
For every bachelorette party, there's a (wilder?) bachelor party.
Alejandro was one of those single men looking for a lady friend or two at his buddy's bachelor party in Vegas.
"We were staying at the Wynn and there was a really big orgy," he said.
Is that so?
"Yeah, I had sex with, like, two or three girls at the same time, but that was, like, three years ago," he fessed.
Sure you did, Alejandro.
Guess what happens in Vegas ends up in the New Times.
Follow Crossfade on Facebook and Twitter @Crossfade_SFL.
