Don't let the stately new museums of mainstream musical artists food you. Miami culture is weird. It's always been weird. And weirdness will stay at the core of this town's ambiance as long as the International Noise Conference continues raging. Each year, Churchill's Pub hosts entire days full of 15-minute sets by uniquely strange artists from all over the world. The only things they have in common: They're loud, and they're like nothing you've ever seen. 9 p.m. to 3 a.m. Thursday through Saturday at Churchill's Pub, 5501 NE Second Ave., Miami; 305-757-1807; churchillspub.com. Admission is free.
This corner of the state is graced with wonderful ocean waves. Another type of wave is rolling in to town, and it's pretty snazzy too. As part of the Carolyn Dorfman Dance program Dance That Connects, the company's renowned dancers will perform the vivacious Waves number, excerpts from the emotionally powerful Mayne Mentshn (My People), and the force-filled Traces. Carolyn Dorfman Dance celebrates its 35th anniversary this year, so this performance is bound to be a visual party. 7:30 p.m. Thursday at Aventura Arts & Cultural Center, 3385 NE 188th St., Aventura; aventuracenter.org. Tickets cost $20 to $37.50.
If former presidential candidate Howard Dean were to introduce South Florida International Fashion Week, he'd probably say, "We're going to Boca! We're going to Lauderdale! We're going to Weston! And then we're heading to Miami! Beeeeeyah!" With four cities and four runway shows presenting emerging and established designers, there will be an event near you worth getting dressed up for. It's all for a good cause too, with proceeds benefitting Fashion for a Cause Foundation, which supports emerging artists and designers. Wednesday through Saturday at various locations throughout South Florida; eventbrite.com. Tickets cost $35 to $200.
In a recent interview with New Times, Robbie Elias said his latest single, "The One Who Hurts Me," helped him get out of a funk. Maybe the soul-drenched, Motown-inspired piece will help put some pep in your step too. Elias will host a single-release party for his new tune at the Anderson, where a four-piece band will back him. 8 p.m. Thursday at the Anderson, 709 NE 79th St., Miami; theandersonmiami.com. Admission is free.
As Van Morrison's classic song says: "Wild night is calling!" So when the Irish singing-songwriting legend comes to town, it's your duty to participate in the wild night, dammit. He's a Rock and Roll Hall of Fame inductee with six Grammys, and his only East Coast headlining shows this year will take place at Miami's James L. Knight Center. 8 p.m. Wednesday at James L. Knight Center, 400 SE Second Ave., Miami; jlkc.com. Tickets cost $71.50 to $256.50.
For some bands, the road to performing at March's Okeechobee Music & Arts Festival is a long and spirited one. Destination Okeechobee is a nationwide competition to find artists to share the stage with the likes of Halsey, Arcade Fire, Snoop Dogg, and other headliners. A handful of bands have already beaten the majority of 3,200 entrants in Round 1. And now it's on to audience voting in Round 2 at 1306 Miami. Of bands such as Jaialai, Chaser, and Above the Skyline, who do you want to send to the big stage? 8 p.m. Thursday at 1306 Miami, 1306 N. Miami Ave., Miami; 1306miami.com. Admission is free.
Maybe massive festivals with massive crowds aren't exactly your thing. You'll be pleased to know there are just 2,000 tickets per day available for the GroundUp Music Festival, which hits Miami Beach for three days. Knowing artists such as Bela Fleck & the Flecktones Trio, the Wood Brothers, and Robert Glasper will perform, you'll want to beat the small masses before tickets are gone. The event will also offer a picturesque beer garden, interactive music workshops with the artists, and grub from celebrity chef Michelle Bernstein. Friday through Sunday at North Beach Bandshell, 7275 Collins Ave., Miami Beach; festival.groundupmusic.net. Tickets start at $85, and three-day passes start at $225.
Creepy doll/murderer Chucky has been around for 25 years. To honor his gruesome entrance into the horror world, O Cinema Wynwood will host a 25th-anniversary screening of Child's Play. Immediately following the film, Chucky creator Don Mancini will chat with the audience via Skype for a Q&A. 11:30 p.m. Friday at O Cinema Wynwood, 90 NW 29th St., Wynwood; o-cinema.org. Tickets cost $12.
"Leave your phone. Experience the moment. This never happened." That's what Lane 8, AKA Daniel Goldstein, asks of audiences when he performs. The Denver-based musician is touring in support of his second album, Little by Little, which dropped last month and is full of warm, pure sounds. And, hey, when was the last time you attended a show where no one was holding up an obnoxious mobile device? 10 p.m. Friday at the Ground, 34 NE 11th St., Miami; ticketfly.com. Tickets cost $12 to $18.
No, Channing Tatum won't be there. But at the Magic Mike XXL Authorized Tribute Show, past Chippendales dancers, Playgirl centerfolds, and GQ models will do their best to compensate. The steamy show rolls into town for what should be an evening of very little clothing, lots of squeals, and flying garments. VIP and all-you-can drink tickets are available. Remember: Be careful and don't grab without permission, unlike everyone else in the news these days. 8 p.m. Friday at 450 NW 27th St., Miami; eventbrite.com. Tickets cost $25 to $100.
With so many remakes and reboots of everything these days, you gotta appreciate a classic. And Miami City Ballet's Program Three is classic ballet at its finest. It boasts a big cast, spectacular costumes, and incredibly difficult moves. Program Three marks famed choreographer Brian Brooks' first piece with Miami City Ballet; he works regularly in Chicago and NYC. 8 p.m. Friday and Saturday and 2 p.m. Sunday at Adrienne Arsht Center for the Performing Arts, 1300 Biscayne Blvd., Miami; arshtcenter.org. Tickets cost $25 to $105.
Fat Tuesday is not for a few more days, but there's plenty of reason to get your Cajun on now. Fort Mardi Gras is back for a third year at Revolution Live. Admission to the spectacle is free, and tons of grub and drinks — including crawfish from a thousand-pound boil, hurricanes, and Abita beer — will be available for purchase. A bazaar will boast craft artists galore, and jams will come courtesy of the Rockin' Jake Band, Bobby Lee Rodgers, and Crazy Fingers. 4 p.m. Saturday at Revolution Live, 100 SW Third Ave., Fort Lauderdale; jointherevolution.net. Admission is free.
Been craving a giant turkey leg and some jostling? Thank the Medieval gods and goddesses that the Renaissance Fest in Deerfield Beach is rolling out months of wench-worthy events at Quiet Waters Park, where dressing like a knight past the age of ten is totally appropriate. The seven themed weekends will include games, jesters, jugglers, music, food, and, of course, bustiers. The festival will kick off with the Swashbucklers & Sirens-themed weekend. So get aboard, matey, and bring your booty to enjoy the show. Check the website for other themed affairs, where cosplay is the only way to go. 10 a.m. Saturday at Quiet Waters Park, 401 S. Powerline Rd., Deerfield Beach; ren-fest.com. Admission starts at $25.
Bro, but can I live? That's the wonderful refrain you'll hear only from the mouth of a Miamian who feels judged or oppressed. Can I Live is also the title of Hialeah-born artist Dre Martinez's opening at Laundromat Art Space. The child of immigrants, he attended the School of Visual Arts in New York City but returned to set down roots in the Magic City. This show is an homage to Miami and explores the good and bad of its residents' experiences via works that shift as quickly as the storefronts of Wynwood. 5 p.m. Saturday at Laundromat Art Space, 5900 NE Second Ave., Miami; laundromatartspace.com. Admission is free to $10.
Ever feel like yoga is a snooze? It won't be at the new Coconut Grove yoga palace, Buddha Shack. This Saturday, it'll host an open house with free 30-minute sessions of both yoga and meditation for all ages and interests. The founders wanted to make a studio that was laid-back and fab, familiar but with a cooler stocked with champagne. With yoga variations that might include hip-hop or weights, and luxury brands in the onsite shop, yogis can gather there and overcome challenging life situations through their practice. 11 a.m. Saturday at Buddha Shack, 3444 Main Hwy., Coconut Grove; buddhashack.co. Admission is free.
If ever there were a time when this nation needed a soul, it's now. That's why you should make sure to bask in the sound and feels of the great Empress of Soul, Gladys Knight, when she graces the Magic City with her divine presence. The seven-time Grammy winner will sing at the Arsht Center this Saturday. A lifelong performer, Knight saw her first album released when she fronted the Pips. During that time, she heard some news through the grapevine and took a "Midnight Train to Georgia." You'll be singing along with the hits at this must-see show. 8 p.m. Saturday at Adrienne Arsht Center for the Performing Arts, 1300 Biscayne Blvd., Miami; arshtcenter.org. Tickets start at $29.
The stories of exiled Cubans in Miami have shaped the mythology of this city. That's why Pérez Art Museum Miami has joined forces with HistoryMiami and WLRN to record and preserve these tales. At Miami Stories of Cuban Exiles, exiles are invited to share their experiences in a recording booth while answering a reporters' questions to build this project. The event is part of the museum's Free Second Saturdays, so you can bring your abuelas, your tíos, and the whole familia. 1 p.m. Saturday at Pérez Art Museum Miami, 1103 Biscayne Blvd., Miami; pamm.org. Admission is free.
Want to appear to be romantic and sympathetic before Valentine's Day? There's just the concert for you and your sweetie. Andrea Bocelli, the operatic pop star who oozes amorous feels with his gorgeous voice, will perform to a crowd of lovers. Supporting the tenor will be Tony-winning actress and singer Kristin Chenoweth and South Florida soprano Nadine Sierra. You'll score big points in the romance department with this one. 7:30 p.m. Sunday at American Airlines Arena, 601 Biscayne Blvd., Miami; arshtcenter.org. Tickets start at $125.
Tyler the Creator is one weird hitmaker. Everything he creates, no matter how confounding, turns to gold. He's a rapper, producer, music video director, designer, and troublemaker who got his start as the frontman for the wild hip-hop crew Odd Future. Though his newest solo album, Flower Boy, didn't win this year's Grammy, fans don't care. He'll headline a show at Miami's James L. Knight Center that Long Beach rapper and Odd Future associate Vince Staples will open. Get ready to feel the pulse of Gen Y. 7:30 p.m. Monday at James L. Knight Center, 400 SE Second Ave., Miami; jlkc.com. Tickets start at $32. Read more about Tyler the Creator on page 33.
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Sometimes starring on a reality show can result in real-world success. Take, for example, 30-year-old choreographer Travis Wall, who appeared on the second season of So You Think You Can Dance, won an Emmy Award for his work on the show's seventh season, and is now touring with his crew, Shaping Sound, in the captivating production After the Curtain, hitting the Adrienne Arsht Center stage Tuesday. This production isn't your average dance show: These guys — including Nick Lazzarini, Lex Ishimoto, and Gaby Diaz — are visual artists who are telling a sad tale of a guy who finds his creative voice again after the loss of his true love. It's pretty romantic and thus the perfect leadup to Valentine's Day. 7:30 p.m. Thursday at Adrienne Arsht Center for the Performing Arts, 1300 Biscayne Blvd., Miami; arshtcenter.org. Tickets cost $39 to $69.
Obsessed with beer and your dear? Unite your great loves this Valentine's Day. A Beer Lover's Affair will put your amor to the test with a trivia game show. Is this a recipe for disaster? Maybe, but there'll be a recipe for success too: a mystery beer flight and chocolate pairing. Enjoy the good life while learning your lover's favorite color. 8 p.m. Wednesday at Concrete Beach Brewery, 325 NW 24th St., Miami; 305-796-2727; concretebeachbrewery.com. Admission is free.