Basketball Wives, Finale: Tami Roman and Evelyn Lozada's Big Brawl

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This has been a serious season of Basketball Wives--maybe the best one yet. And in true Wives style, the ladies ended this season with a bang. And we mean a bang to the face. But before we get to that, let's discuss the last night's episode as a whole. Suzie Ketcham's trip to L.A. was very informative. We learned that Miami and Chicago are the worst town for groupies. We guess the Windy City and Magic City are just jam packed full of sluts.

Furthermore, Evelyn Lozada and Ochocinco's relationship kind of blows our mind. We're

not sure if it's very 2011 or what -- with their meeting on Twitter and having Skype

dates (or maybe they're just in Dungeon and Dragons chat rooms). ISn't it nuts that they are pretty

much dating and but have never met in person?

And when Jennifer Williams stops by to discuss it, she makes a very good point. When they get married (they are now engaged), does she have to change her last name to Ochocinco? Is she really going to have to have that name on her AmEx or check into hotels as Mrs. 85? That's either the coolest or most embarrassing thing ever.

And before heading to Cinci to see Ocho, Evelyn has her hot 25-year-old trainer stop by to make her dinner before she breaks up with him. Three words come to mind: Get it, girl.

It is oddly fascinating to watch her transition from Miami to the Midwest. We have all been on first dates, and they are always a little strange. But their first meeting goes from sweet to sexual literally in a matter of minutes. It's great to see our girl Evelyn give it up so quickly. We mean, as we learned earlier, girls in Miami are all sluts. Takes one to know one.

We're going to have to assume that Royce Reed won't be back for season three. Why? Well, she was barely invited to Shaunie O'Neal's goodbye happy hour and Evelyn seemed less than excited that she was even in attendance in the first place. And we learned that Evelyn most definitley wont be including her in their trip out to L.A. to see Shaunie. So, yeah, see you later Royce! We hope your friendship with Suzie was worth it.

Jennifer's lip gloss launch party... was it strange, bougie, or both? Definitley both. Have you all ever been to a launch of anything? It's very chic: guest lists, bottle serivce, tons of people, red carpets, etc. But here, it looked more like a basic dinner date than this glamorous launch of her lip gloss. Did we mention that none of her friends knew about the lip gloss line? Strange, so very strange. 

These ladies really know how to have a meal and Jennifer's birthday dinner was no different. Of coure, Royce didnt show up, probably because she is on her way out. But this dinner was mind blowing. It started off with Tami Roman (who only makes an appearance at dinner the whole episode), making a tearful speech to the ladies of how much they mean to her. Then, minutes later, Evelyn is spilling the beans how she used to sleep with Tami's ex-husband back in the day and thinks Jennifer's birthday is the perfect place to tell her.

First off, why does Evelyn love athletes so much? Could it be their plush bank accounts? And as a fan of this show, isn't weird that Gloria's sister got shit all first season for sleeping with Shaq? Somehow this secret went under the radar for two years, but we're going to act like it's not big deal because mental note-- Tami was married to him at the time. This revelation leads to a big dramatic chat and eventually Miss Roman hitting Eve in the face. We think the line that set her off was Evelyn's "You are a non-mother-fucking-factor, bitch" -- it's what every ex-wife wants to hear from her ex's mistress. Then the episode ends ... to say we had a mild heart attack is an understatement. 

And we're excited to announce that next week is the reuion. And if it's anything like last year's Wives reunion, it's going to be dramatic.

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