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Andy Cohen Makes Miami Book Tour Stop, Talks Real Housewives, Tinder, and Puppy Love

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Andy Cohen is hitting the road for a tour promoting his new book, The Andy Cohen Diaries: A Deep Look at a Shallow Year. The memoir recounts his star-studded adventures of the last 365 days, which means tons of name dropping (he actually states in the introduction he almost called the book Diary of a Name Dropper) and the dirty scoop on the rich and famous who Cohen gets to hang with on the daily.

Last night, fans of Cohen gathered at Villa Azur for Gilt City exclusive book launch and signing party. The guest of the night was of course Cohen himself, who took questions from the audience on anything from what housewife he'd shag, marry, or kill (Nini, Teresa and Vicki, in that order) to who his boy crush (it updates every minute). Miami's Real Housewives were there for support and to mingle with fans who drove from the outskirts of Kendall for a photo opp and a signed copy of Cohen's book.

See also: Seinfeld Writer Peter Mehlman on New Novel: "The Entire Book Was Inspired by Annoyance"

Inspired by the Andy Warhol Diaries, which recorded the life of the pop art mastermind for a nine-year period, Cohen's takes a similar route. The book opens with a quote by Warhol: "I have a social disease. I have to go out every night. If I stay at home I start spreading rumors to my dog." Funnily enough, The Andy Cohen Diaries winds up being a love story between Cohen and his dog, Wacha.

"I've never had an animal in my life and anyone who's ever gotten an animal will relate to what I went through in the past year," he says. "He's taught me the importance of taking care of something other than yourself. Even though it's an animal it's amazing the attachment and love you could have."

As much as he is attached to Wacha, Cohen still cheats on the his beagle-foxhound mix with a ton of celebrities, like when goes as Sarah Jessica Parker's date to the Met gala, or recounts tons of hot dates with guys who didn't turn into anything more. "I also join Tinder in the book." Yep, he joins online dating for the first time ever and even gets blocked by some dude. The reason? "I have no idea, I can't predict these things. Not everyone is going to love you."

The Andy Cohen Diaries is written in the same conversational tone and with the no-filter attitude that the producer and host of Bravo's Watch What Happens Live conducts his interviews in. When asked if he had a ghostwriter, Cohen responded by saying "read one page and you'll see it couldn't be written by any other person." But what about the nights he couldn't remember? He assures there were none and he wrote every single day. That doesn't mean he didn't party -- he did plenty of that and it's all accounted for in 350 pages of ink. We asked Cohen who could party the hardest: "probably me and Jimmy Fallon."

As for what the audience wanted to know, there were probing questions on his favorite celebrity to get stoned with (Willie Nelson), who his all star cast of housewives would consist of (Nini, Teresa, Vanderpump, Bethenny, and Adriana), and what his Real Housewives tag line would be (I may be a man but I fight like a girl). Others didn't have the interview skills that Cohen does -- someone asked if he was ever going to get Oprah on the show. "Sweetie, join 2014. Oprah was on the show." Fail.

During his time in Miami, Cohen hit up Score with a friend, but apparently didn't score himself. Besides partying and downright hilarity, the book also has some serious and heartfelt moments, like when a friend tells Cohen that he's fat and he comes to that realization. Or a story on what Cohen considers was the most impactful day of last year in which he hit a ball in front of 35,000 people in Minneapolis. "I faced this really deep fear, which was hitting a ball in front of people which I'm so bad at and was so bad at little league and I did it and it was an incredible day. I don't know that I would have done it had I not been writing the book, but I got invited and thought, 'well this could challenge me,' so I did it and it was amazing."

So what else is Cohen still challenged by? "I feel challenged to find a significant other." He tells us he's still looking for love, which till now he's only felt for Wacha. "I'm looking for someone strong, independent, handsome, and funny. You know, together. I don't take myself seriously whatsoever, so someone who can handle that and share that with me." That and not be jealous of a pup.

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