BEST LOW-RENT BAR Miami 2004 - Misty Blue
Only God knows how this little shithole manages to stay in business. It is truly beyond human cognition. The entrance is an unmarked door hidden between a liquor store and a pawnshop. Misty Blue -- if that is its real name -- has been the target of drug busts and late-night debauchery for years. It's dirty in more ways than one. And if you're drinking here, you most likely have succumbed to the trials and denials that beat down the average person just trying to live a decent life. Down and out, maybe for the count, you might find some poor, sauced-out drunkard standing outside panhandling for money to cop dope. Or are you looking in a mirror? The cops -- hmmm, maybe that's why it's so hard to find the phone number for this dive. Be on the lookout for the countless number of panties that drape over the fat, slovenly bartender even as you glance around for potentially dangerous barflies. As for the panties, be warned of a Blue tradition: Every woman must give up her panties the first time she orders something from the bar. Yeah, hot babes are lined up four deep. Panties uncovered as a cover: Now that's classy.