Historically, the babes in video games have been, well, babes. Scantily dressed and kicking the other characters' teeth loose -- sometimes it's hard to pay attention to their mad fighting skillz when their boobs look 3D. But hey, isn't that one of the reasons you picked Anna Williams for this round of Tekken 6?
We know it's true. When the fighting game Wanted Dead or Alive came out, fanboys (and fangirls) everywhere were eager to finish the game so they could see the final cut scenes - the scenes in which the already half-naked female characters got completely naked and took....a shower? Yeah, that's right. A video game just wouldn't be complete without a shower scene. Duh. Well, we're celebrating the sublime, not the ridiculous, so you're not going to see Taki (and her nipples) from Soul Caliber or any of those other skank-ass hos. So, in honor of all the masturbatory fantasies that we, ahem, you've had over the years, here's Cultist's top digital hotties of all time.
The Tekken series: The Williams Sisters
We know; we're kinda cheating. Just like throwing your opponent in Mortal Kombat, right guys? Anyway, we're putting Nina and Anna together because them bitches is crazy, yo! For real though, can you tell which one of them is the psycho? We sure can't. This is a typical case of sibling rivalry, except with mind erasing and assassination attempts. Who cares? They're hot.
Mortal Kombat II: Mileena
Yes, we know she's a clone of Kitana's, but Kitana is so annoying with her little gravity lift and Mileena's moves are so much cooler. Besides, it's kinda hot that one of her fatalities is to suck your entire body into her mouth and then spit out your skeleton. We'll avoid the obvious puns. It's all up to you.
Parasite Eve (the original): Aya Brea
She's clever; she's deadly; and she's fully clothed! She was a tough NYPD cop on the inside, but boy did she clean up nice. Remember when she gets to the opera in her red dress? Before the mitochondria kicks in and shit gets all crazy? Yeah, we do too.
Mortal Kombat vs. DC Universe: Catwoman
This is really our number one, were it not for the mad respect we have for our next choice. You have played Mortal Kombat vs DC Universe, right? Catwoman sure has changed over the years. You'd never catch Eartha Kitt with half her business hanging out. Either way, Catwoman has all the right moves. She's dressed head to toe in latex and she carries a whip. Need we say more?
Lara Croft Tomb Raider the series: Lara Croft
Okay, we know she's old in video game years, but isn't she the one who kinda started it all? You know, the "realistic" looking hot video game character? C'mon, don't you even dare come at me with those Precious Moment-looking Japanese characters. Lara had you from the moment you saw her in those sexy, yet practical shorts and that wifebeater. Don't even play -- the woman's an icon.
What's the only thing better than one Lara Croft? Yup -- two Lara Crofts duking it out.
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