Uncle Luke, the man whose booty-shaking madness made the U.S. Supreme Court stand up for free speech, gets as nasty as he wants to be for Miami New Times. This week, Luke goes after Miami Democrats for supporting losers in local elections.Miami-Dade Democrats are feeling mighty good about President Barack…
Kim, Khloe and Kourtney Kardashian will officially receive the key to the city of North Miami this morning, because that’s just the cold, sad, dark world we live in now a days…
On its website, Design Place at 5175 NE Second Court is billed as the Design District’s most desirable Miami condo rental community for young professionals, graduate students and small families. But a local organization that fights unfair housing practices is suing SPV Realty, a New York company that owns the…
You know what the Spanish-language music world needs? More LMFAO. And luckily, after douching it up with Mexican “EDM” boy band 3BallMTY at last night’s Latin Grammys, SkyBlu of currently-on-hiatus hip-pop visionaries Loving My Friends and Others revealed his new hobbies … Fucking with Latin tunes and Rosetta Stone. “I’m…
Every Friday, Riptide brings you the most eye-catching mugshots taken the previous week (or thereabouts) in Miami-Dade County. Yes, there is some mockery of bad neck tattoos, but also adulation directed at perps who just plain look more badass than we ever will. This is the italicized intro to that…
Do we want our kids fuckin’ wit’ Gunplay? That was the question when the Miami rapper and accused armed robber placed a surprise call to internet radio’s Combat Jack Show today. “I don’t make music for [children],” replied Mr. Play (born Richard Morales Jr.), still chillin’ at his crib on…
Luke’s Gospel: Cubans Go Liberal; Bye, Marco Rubio
Long Voting Lines Were a GOP Plot
New York Times food critic Pete Wells has reviewed Guy Fieri’s new Times Square-area restaurant, Guy’s American Kitchen & Bar.Well, it’s less a review than a fully-formed script for a Saturday Night Live episode in which a food critic asks the bowling shirt-attired television personality…why? Just why?Never have I sympathized…
If you’re lucky, you might catch a glimpse of a 54-year-old nipple at a Madonna concert. Ass, however, is going to cost you extra. Performing in front of a sold-out crowd at New York City’s Madison Square Garden, the Material Girl added stripping to her list of NSFW moments when…
After raising nearly a million bucks to unseat four Miami-Dade County Commissioners in the August 14 primary, it seems billionaire auto magnate Norman Braman threw in the towel. According to the last three financial reports for his political action committee Change Miami Dade Now, Braman only chipped in $80,000 for…
The closing of Sustain, the Midtown restaurant that emphasized local everything, elicited groans from some parts of the blogosphere. Months later, the space remains empty, but rumor has it the team behind the adjacent Sugarcane (and Lincoln Road’s Sushi Samba Dromo) has taken over the space and is planning an…
Oh PETA, I’ve got your number. You’re like that girl in college who always got drunk and flashed her boobs before vomiting on her shoes. You’ll do anything for attention.Look, I know that you’ve got an important message to get across, and we need animal rights advocates just as much…
The fact that Peter Rosello apparently filmed himself punching a homeless man in the groin has not stopped Peter Rosello from telling a judge that he’s not guilty of punching a homeless man in the groin.Rosello, the son of Real Housewives of Miami star Alexia Echevarria and step-son of Hialeah…
Every Friday, Riptide brings you the most eye-catching mugshots taken the previous week (or thereabouts) in Miami-Dade County. Yes, there is some mockery of bad neck tattoos, but also adulation directed at perps who just plain look more badass than we ever will. This is the italicized intro to that…
Now we know why Mitt Romney released a last minute campaign ad in South Florida trying to link Hugo Chavez and Fidel Castro to Barack Obama. It was a desperation.Romney knew he had to to stave off the biggest surprise of the presidential election in Florida: Nearly half of Miami-Dade’s…
Carlos Miller: Not guilty! As one of Miami’s most fervent free speech activists, Miller was facing a criminal misdemeanor of resisting arrest stemming from a tussle with one particular member of Miami-Dade Police Department’s finest on January 31.While filming county and City of Miami cops clearing out Occupy Miami protesters…
Jermaine, America’s umpteenth most popular Jackson, is considering a homophonic surname switch. Michael’s barely relevant celebrity brother has filed a name-change petition in Los Angeles, according to TMZ. And yeah … Jermaine Jackson wants to legally become “Jermaine Jacksun” for “artistic reasons.” The artist formally known as Jermaine Jackson released…
Voter Suppression: Is Mayor Carlos Gimenez Like Fidel Castro?
Reader Mail: Don’t Mock Jesus on the New Times Cover
“What’s your favorite restaurant?” That question got us all thinking. If we had to choose one top dog at gunpoint, what would it be and why? Recently Short Order bloggers began celebrate their favorite eateries — be they celebrity-chef-driven or a neighborhood hole-in-the wall. Why? Because we’re tired of having…
While Floridians were busy re-electing Barack Obama, voters in Puerto Rico yesterday participated in a referendum posing a fundamental question to their political status with the United States: statehood or no statehood?The first question on the two-part referendum asked voters if they wanted to change their relationship with the United…
