Florida’s New 75 MPH Speed Limits Are Closer To Becoming Reality

Do you often find yourself cruising Miami’s highways and thinking to yourself, “I really, truly wish that everyone on this road would drive even faster”? If so, you are a maniac probably bent on your own fiery death, and you are also in luck. Because Florida’s legislature looks just about…

Hip-Hop Trio Migos Involved In I-95 Party Bus Shootout

Atlanta rap trio Migos have had a hell of a 2014 already, with Complex naming one member, Quavo, the year’s most influential rapper for his oft-imitated rhythm as the group has dropped new videos with Souljah Boy and about Emmitt Smith. Early this morning, the crew were headed south down…

12-Year-Old Boy Steals Car, Promptly Crashes

No word on whether he just wanted to do hoodrat stuff with his friend, but a 12-year-old boy was arrested on charges of grand theft auto today after stealing and crashing a Trans Am in Miami. Spring Break cannot end soon enough…

Baby Baboon Born at Jungle Island

Isis, a four year-old baboon at Jungle Island, is experiencing her first joys of motherhood after giving birth to a newborn baby yesterday. Which means obviously that she already wants to share the baby photos with you. See also: Tiny Florida Panther Kitten Rescued from Abandonment Is Adorable…

Secret Service Agents Were Suspected of Driving Drunk in Miami

The Secret Service is once again in some not-so-secret shit. Two years after the agency was humiliated when 11 members were sent home from Colombia after using local prostitutes, three more agents were removed from duty in The Netherlands this week when a 34-year-old officer was discovered unconscious 10 feet…

Kobe Bryant Blasts Miami Heat’s Tribute to Trayvon Martin

Kobe Bryant is the subject of a sobering New Yorker profile that follows the basketball icon as he enters the waning days of his playing career. Bryant takes aim at the Miami Heat during an interview. Not for anything basketball related, but rather, oddly, for the team’s public tribute to…

Need Fake Ultra Tickets? Craigslist Has You Covered

In case you haven’t heard, Ultra starts Friday. As of Wednesday evening, tickets to the weekend megafestival were 98 percent sold out, according to the organization’s website. And oh, there’s this: The three-day general admission passes retail for $400, plus a $90 service charge. But thanks to Craigslist, wannabe Ultra-goers…

Autograph Fakery: Two Firms Monopolize a Lucrative Business

There aren’t many places more sublime than Augusta National Golf Club on an early April morning. Dew sparkles on the greens, delicately raked sand traps beckon, and the best golfers on Earth stroll around the fairways, imagining the strokes they hope will lead to the Masters’ green jacket. April 9,…

Watermelon-Smashing Comedian Gallagher Peddles Gay Play in Miami

Leo Gallagher is standing on the patio of Gramps Bar in Wynwood and explaining his new pro-gay play to a group of disheveled, confused hipsters. The prop comic, who grew up in South Tampa and became famous for smashing watermelons onstage, has more recently made headlines for being racist and…

Miami Springs Hires a Financially Troubled City Clerk

Ever ask for a raise before you’ve even started a job? That’s exactly what Erika Gonzalez-Santamaria did after she was offered a $71,850 gig as the new city clerk for Miami Springs. She accepted the job but asked for $75,000 and was granted that boost before she begins April 1…