Rules for Dating a Sugar Daddy or Mama

No, this headline isn’t rage-bait — especially in Miami, where people get particularly creative to pay the rent. We’ve already written at length about where and how to meet sugar daddies and mamas in the wild, so it would be irresponsible of us not to provide insights on how to maintain those types of relationships once you reel ’em in.

While these arrangements might appear straightforward, they actually entail more than just a sexy young thing meeting a monied benefactor and living happily ever after (with jewels, bags, and expensive cars). As with most things in life, there are rules of engagement. Bagging a daddy/mama and keeping them are two different quests. But fear not, because we’ve compiled a set of instructions so you can, without fear or judgment, pursue the Anna Nicole life of your dreams.

Call a Spade a Spade

Don’t tiptoe around the kind of relationship you’re looking for: Gifts. For. Company. Now is not the time to be polite. Open with warmth, but be direct to secure your boat days and trips to Bal Harbour.

Cash Makes It a Different Kind of Relationship

Your time isn’t charity, but you also aren’t Julia Roberts in Pretty Woman. Sugar dating might be considered sex work to some, but there is a line between being spoiled and prostitution. If you want to stay on the former side of it, accept gifts in the form of items or experiences.

Be Hot and Funny

If you’re sugar dating, charm and beauty are your currency. If you’re not good at being one of those things, make sure you’re great at the other.

Gifts Are for Your Company, Not Favors

Gifts are the reason for sugar dating in the first place, but how they’re given dictates the relationship. Your daddy/mama should be showing their generosity for the pleasure of your company. (For further clarification, refer back to Rule No. 2)

Be Upfront in the Sheets but Discreet in the Streets

Define the relationship with your daddy or mama, but keep the sordid details between the two of you. Your benefactor doesn’t necessarily want to advertise the transactional nature of your tryst to their country club friends and business associates. In fact, they want it to look like you’re just crazy attracted to each other. “I like him for his sense of humor!” is a good line to start practicing.

Have a Backup Plan

Like in every relationship and job, your position with your sugar daddy/mama might not be permanent. Should your sugar benefactor one day decide that it’s time to cut you loose, it’s very important that you haven’t quit your day job. That rent isn’t going to pay itself.

Reframe the Relationship If You Catch Feelings

Workplace romances are so common that we can easily rattle off at least a dozen romcoms based on them. Why should sugar dating be any different? If your daddy/mama is starting to look like husband/wifey material, it’s time for a heart-to-heart.

Safety First

Some of these might be a little tongue-in-cheek, but not this one. When first getting to know your sugar daddy or mama, make sure to meet in public, tell a friend where you’re going and who you’ll be with, and keep personal information like your home address private. If you’re going to play the long game, you’ll need to be safe and healthy.