Audio By Carbonatix
What is it about Florida and fucked-up moms? We either produce them, like once-alleged baby-killer Casey Anthony (not guilty our ass!), or we recruit them, like Nadya “Octomom” Suleman, also known as the human vagina with child. That’s right. She’s coming to town. Not sure about her brood, though.
Turns out Octomom is not traveling to South Florida to produce more babies. Instead she’s taking the next logical step: having her face punched in. Suleman is said to be planning a trip into the boxing ring in an even more grotesque version of celebrity boxing (we didn’t think it was possible) than what came before. This makes Danny Bonaduce versus Barry Williams look like a legitimate prize fight. Read on for the gory details.
The Celebrity Boxing Federation confirmed that a bout with Suleman is in the works for August 20 against a yet unknown challenger at the Ocean Manor in Fort
Lauderdale. If only Casey Anthony would step up and join her. We envision that
scene in Rocky III in which Rocky and Apollo Creed hit each other at
the same time. Only in our version, Anthony’s and Suleman’s heads
explode, leaving decapitated and bloodied corpses (sorry for that, it
could not be helped).
Apparently, they’re asking for possible challengers to submit their
names for consideration at celebrityboxing@live.com. “We are looking for any woman who would like the chance in the spotlight and take Octomom on in a Novelty Fun Boxing,” representatives wrote in an email to New Times. We’d think of
another dumb joke here but we feel too dirty already. The fight will be three one-minute rounds.
Follow Cultist on Facebook and Twitter @CultistMiami.
