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Beer Me Wins Hatuey Beer’s Art Contest

In what might go down in history as the best title of all time, artist Adbul Delgado's Beer Me has been designated as the newest marketing image for Cuban beer brand, Hatuey. The brew, whose roots run back to 1920s Cuba, was recently revived by Bacardi. Back in their heyday,...
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S.S. Coachella: Drinking Wine With James Murphy on the High Seas

Old punk guys and fancy wines, two things that make sense together only now, mere days before the end of the world. Nothing is more a "sign of the times" than James Murphy and Justin Chearno hosting a winetasting in the middle of the ocean for a handful of people...
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Gypsy the Giant Black Dog Tells Our Fortune, Dashes Our Dreams

Human beings are superstitious. We believe black cats are bad luck, stepping on cracks leads to broken backs, and Magic 8 Balls and cheap cookies can foretell the future. So is it any less plausible that an artist's creation could prognosticate accurately? See also: - Desi Santiago's Giant Dog Installation...
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Sunny LaValle: Eat to Beat the Flu

Like an impending tornado, the flu is circling, looming and ready to strike. The CDC estimates that 128 million doses of the flu vaccine have already been administered as of this month, which is a whopping 95 percent of the total manufacturers planned to produce all year. Boston even declared...
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The Ten Most Popular New Times Features of 2012

Here at Miami New Times we publish one in-depth, 5,000 word feature a week. We're one of the few publications in Miami that does so regularly. It's kind of our thing.Of course, some tend to resonate more with others. Here are our ten most popular features of the year, as...
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Julian Consuegra: Punk Rock by Design

Miami's underground fashion scene may be small, but it has proven more than capable of producing world-class creatives. Take 24-year-old Julian Consuegra, a Miami Lakes native who has found success by paying homage to South Florida through clothes that sample the 305's youth culture. His label, Stray Rats, uses strong...
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Dolphins Rout Bills 24-10, Are Knocked Out of the Playoffs Anyway

The Miami Dolphins trounced the Bills yesterday behind a 3 TD day from Reggie "LaMontelle Pussyhammer" Bush, a balls-up performance from Reshad Jones and an efficient day from Ryan Tannehill that saw the rookie join the 3,000-yard club for the season. However, a few hours later the Fins found out...
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Obama Won Florida Because of the Gay Vote

Barack Obama might have gay voters to thank for his reelection, especially right here in Florida. A new analysis suggests that if only straight people went to the polls here, Romney would have pulled off a win by something like two percentage points...
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The 12 Days of Christmas – Short Order Style!

Christmas carols are awful. They're cheery, and wintery, and boast the same effects as Ambien does for insomnia. The 12 Days of Christmas is your Christmas playlist's biggest offender. But when things go awry at the Christmas table tonight, Short Order has a way of one-upping the hot mess that...