Humor

Florida Man Arrested For Masturbating on Boat Ramp

There are lots of appropriate places to masturbate on a fine Florida Saturday afternoon. Your bedroom. A locked, private bathroom. Even the cabin of your sailboat probably would be AOK.

However, the open deck of your sailboat -- especially when that boat is parked on a public boat dock full of weekend traffic -- is not one of those acceptable locations. A 67-year-old Florida man was arrested this week for breaking that common sense rule and then explaining to a sheriff's deputy that he was simply "exercising."

Deputies from the Lee's County Sheriff's Office were called to a public boat ramp in Alva, a small town outside Fort Meyers, on Saturday after boaters spotted an older man sitting on the back of his parked sailboat and openly masturbating.

Confronted by a off-duty cop, the man yelled "F##% you!" police say.

When uniformed police arrived, they confirmed that 67-year-old Scott Barron was indeed fondling himself on his boat deck.

Barron explained to police that he was simply exercising, but the excuse didn't fly.

He was arrested and charged with indecent exposure.

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Tim Elfrink is a former investigative reporter and managing editor for Miami New Times. He has won the George Polk Award and was a finalist for the Goldsmith Prize for Investigative Reporting.
Contact: Tim Elfrink