Between 1984 and 1989, Don Johnson and Philip Michael Thomas, as “Sonny” and “Rico,” respectively, were the coolest motherfuckers on television, eliminating highly dramatized drug crime ’round South Beach in pimp Armani blazers over pastel t-shirts on NBC’s Miami Vice every Friday night. And just like show itself, music featured…
Every Friday, Riptide brings you the most eye-catching mugshots taken the previous week (or thereabouts) in Miami-Dade County. Yes, there is some mockery of bad neck tattoos, but also adulation directed at perps who just plain look more badass than we ever will. This is the italicized intro to that…
Pain & Gain opens tomorrow. And when it does, Miami’s gym culture, New Times, and our city’s seedy underbelly will have their moment in the sun — their steroid-fueled, bicep-bulging, vein-popping 15 minutes of fame. If you’re a dude (or a chick — we don’t discriminate) who wants to score…
Two months ago, six Hialeah Police officers stamped out a gathering of young folks attempting to shoot an impromptu street video of “Harlem Shake,” the popular Internet meme that went so viral even the Miami Heat players did their own version. When cops ordered the crowd to disperse on February…
Just in case you thought the late-night talk-show circuit was getting too crowded, make room for one more celeb in the mix — and be sure to add some ice-cold milk. Beginning May 7, celebrity cereal mascot Cap’n Crunch will host his very own late-night YouTube talk show every other…
Americans Caused Boston Marathon Tragedy
Reader Mail: No One Is Worse Than Jeffrey Loria
Uncle Luke, the man whose booty-shaking music made the U.S. Supreme Court stand up for free speech, gets as nasty as he wants to be for Miami New Times. This week, Luke explains why Americans fuel terrorism. It’s a beautiful thing when Americans come together during a crisis. Whether it’s…
Every Friday, Riptide brings you the most eye-catching mugshots taken the previous week (or thereabouts) in Miami-Dade County. Yes, there is some mockery of bad neck tattoos, but also adulation directed at perps who just plain look more badass than we ever will. This is the italicized intro to that…
If you think writing a good catchy jingle is easy, think again, young grasshopper. For every “You Deserve a Break Today” and “I Wish I Were an Oscar Meyer Weiner,” there are dozens of cringe-worthy losers. They are the musical equivalent of road kill, but still demand attention. Then, like…
Lagniappe is a Big Easy-style beer-and-wine bar/restaurant/live music venue. Although it may sound like a lot of things, Lagniappe is also resoundingly uncomplicated. At the Midtown bar, which opened late last year, there are no waiters. There are no menus, no silverware, no china, and no cloth napkins. Lagniappe, rather,…
Last week, Banana Republican warned readers about a private parking lot on 17th Street and Lennox Avenue on Miami Beach masquerading as a public lot. It’s even equipped with a meter that is identical to the ones used by the City of Miami Beach for street parking and public lots.Except…
Florida lawmakers need to roll up a fat joint to celebrate 4/20 and chill out. While Republican legislators move full speed ahead to ban the sale of bongs and glass pipes, they ignore a measure to legalize medical marijuana. These guys must think we’re still living in 1936, the year…
Reader Mail: South Beach Tow Companies Are the Biggest Scam on Earth
Miami-Dade Circuit Judge Jorge E. Cueto should have known better. On Tuesday, he angrily removed himself from a civil case challenging Miami Commissioner Michelle Spence-Jones’ third run for office. After ruling in favor of her opponent, Rev. Richard Dunn, that she could not run again, local media outlets reported that…
Uncle Luke, the man who made the U.S. Supreme Court stand up for free speech, gets as nasty as he wants to be for Miami New Times. This week, Luke says its time to legalize medical marijuana.Florida lawmakers need to roll up a fat joint and chill out. While the…
The explosion at the Boston Marathon rippled throughout the country Monday night. Horrible pictures affected anyone like me who had ever run a marathon. Lots of South Florida runners were affected. A couple of examples: The New Yorker is quoting Ken Bereski, from Miami, who had just finished his 12th…
Back in February, Banana Republican tackled the thorniest, hot-button political issue of the moment: banning assault rifles. Even though I took an objective approach to the subject, a majority of comments in response to the cover story were full of invective and sabre rattling from gun enthusiasts from around the…
In the lakeside tourist city of Granada, Nicaragua, visitors strolling along La Calle Libertad come upon a blue Colonial-style building with a small sign reading, “Salon La Libertad.” On a recent afternoon, a slim Cuban-American woman with short blond hair and intense blue eyes chats on her cell phone inside…
Rutgers Scandal Shows NCAA’s Slave Mentality
Reader Mail: EDM’s Drug Fetish Needs to End
For weeks, the Miami Dolphins have been promising that the team won’t move forward with the $390 million renovation of Sun Life Stadium if the NFL doesn’t award the city a Super Bowl in 2015 or 2016. Well, the Dolphins caught a break.A couple of hours ago, during deliberations by…
