Mugshots Friday: Yes, a Florida Marlins Face Tattoo Exists

Every Friday, Riptide brings you the most eye-catching mugshots taken the previous week (or thereabouts) in Miami-Dade County. Yes, there is some mockery of bad neck tattoos, but also adulation directed at perps who just plain look more badass than we ever will. This is the italicized intro to that…

Video Shows Hialeah Cops Intimidating “Harlem Shakers”

Two months ago, six Hialeah Police officers stamped out a gathering of young folks attempting to shoot an impromptu street video of “Harlem Shake,” the popular Internet meme that went so viral even the Miami Heat players did their own version. When cops ordered the crowd to disperse on February…

Cap’n Crunch to Host Late-Night Internet Talk Show

Just in case you thought the late-night talk-show circuit was getting too crowded, make room for one more celeb in the mix — and be sure to add some ice-cold milk. Beginning May 7, celebrity cereal mascot Cap’n Crunch will host his very own late-night YouTube talk show every other…

Boston Marathon Bombing Won’t Unite Us For Long

Uncle Luke, the man whose booty-shaking music made the U.S. Supreme Court stand up for free speech, gets as nasty as he wants to be for Miami New Times. This week, Luke explains why Americans fuel terrorism. It’s a beautiful thing when Americans come together during a crisis. Whether it’s…

Mugshots Friday: Ladies Is Pimps Too

Every Friday, Riptide brings you the most eye-catching mugshots taken the previous week (or thereabouts) in Miami-Dade County. Yes, there is some mockery of bad neck tattoos, but also adulation directed at perps who just plain look more badass than we ever will. This is the italicized intro to that…

Lagniappe: Miami’s Best Beer-and-Wine Spot ($5 Cheese Plates!)

Lagniappe is a Big Easy-style beer-and-wine bar/restaurant/live music venue. Although it may sound like a lot of things, Lagniappe is also resoundingly uncomplicated. At the Midtown bar, which opened late last year, there are no waiters. There are no menus, no silverware, no china, and no cloth napkins. Lagniappe, rather,…

Smoke Pot Now, Tallahassee

Florida lawmakers need to roll up a fat joint to celebrate 4/20 and chill out. While Republican legislators move full speed ahead to ban the sale of bongs and glass pipes, they ignore a measure to legalize medical marijuana. These guys must think we’re still living in 1936, the year…

State Lawmakers Want To Ruin 4/20 For Everybody

Uncle Luke, the man who made the U.S. Supreme Court stand up for free speech, gets as nasty as he wants to be for Miami New Times. This week, Luke says its time to legalize medical marijuana.Florida lawmakers need to roll up a fat joint and chill out. While the…

Boston Marathon: Miami Runners Describe Finish UPDATED

The explosion at the Boston Marathon rippled throughout the country Monday night. Horrible pictures affected anyone like me who had ever run a marathon. Lots of South Florida runners were affected. A couple of examples: The New Yorker is quoting Ken Bereski, from Miami, who had just finished his 12th…

Rutgers Scandal Is the Latest Sign the NCAA Sucks

Uncle Luke, the man whose booty-shaking madness made the U.S. Supreme Court stand up for free speech, gets as nasty as he wants to be for Miami New Times. This week, Luke goes in on the NCAA’s plantation blueprint.The scandal at Rutgers University, where basketball coach Mike Rice was fired…