I have a confession: I’m addicted to those home cleaning shows, the ones where homeowners sell, purge and donate all of their useless household crap so they can live in clutter-free peace. The shows – especially the annoying yet endearing Clean House – have inspired me to get rid of…
Message and a throttle SpongeBob SquarePants aficionados know Mr. Krabs as the invertebrate’s boss at the fastfood operation the Krusty Krab, where SpongeBob is a fry cook. Our own Krusty Krab came into my family’s life one recent day, when my wife, driving on her lunch break, spotted a blue…
“Asturias is known the world over for its mountains, for its coal mines, for its fabada and its cider.” — writer Mario Vargas Llosa The latter two were on hand for Miamians to sample this past Wednesday at the great Spanish cafe/market/bakeryDelicias de la España (4016 S 57th. Ave., Miami;…
So there I was trying to cross Biscayne Boulevard to pick up some lunch about 3:00 p.m. when a Miami-Dade motorcycle cop stopped me in my tracks. “Get out of the street,” he shouted. Huh. Then I complained. “Whatinhell is this? I’m hungry.” The cop felt bad. It’ll only be…
Fabolous flaked out on his Mansion performance on Thursday, October 11. Last night at Mansion, you would have thought Pamela Anderson was pole dancing naked as the Thursday night party crowd packed in tight, it looked like a hurricane shelter. In fact, the weeknight party-goers waited for hours and shelled…
Calvin Godfrey Alan Rigerman with Chaos, his cougar Following the publication of Cat People, Alan Rigerman’s star has risen tenfold. And by that, we mean, he made it on a Spanish-language morning show, Despierta America. He brought his cougar, a lizard and Anthony, a masseuse in-training who helps Rigerman handle…
Recently, the Equal Employment Opportunity Commission announced a small change in how it categorizes people in annual surveys. For the last 40 years, the EEOC document has provided one box for. . . um, Portuguese/Spanish/Pan-Latin Americans to check. That box was called “Hispanic.” But that box is no more. Instead,…
We’ve loved Mac’s Club Deuce for a long time now. We enjoy the dark ambiance, the gregarious regulars, and the pink linoleum, horseshoe shaped bar. We especially love ol’ Mac himself, and the bartenders who keep our Jack and Cokes coming strong, fast, and cheap — just the way we…
Remember April 28, 2007? Probably not. That’s when some activists, many of them anti-Iraq war crusaders, got together across the country to use their bodies to spell out IMPEACH. The paltry showing on Coney Island could barely muster a sad E. But more and more anti-war activists are becoming more…
Banned for life? Probably. There’s a lot of truth to the notion that we should punish “the deed, not the breed” when it comes to Pit Bulls. Pits and other dogs prone to violence most often commit it because of owners who stir the genetic stew, looking to bring out…
In the current climate of environmental do-goodism, there are two kinds of people. One is Robert, a portly man loading five plastic bags filled with food into his Chevy Tahoe SUV in the parking lot of the Fresh Market, the upscale grocery store in Coconut Grove. His ginormous white vehicle…
Michael Berke looks the biker-dude part. He’s a solid six feet in tattoos, Harley jeans, a black cut-off T-shirt, a narrow ginger beard, the beginnings of a Fu Manchu, and a freckled, clean-shaven head. On a recent Tuesday, he climbs a wooden ladder in a suburban Delray Beach garage and…
Siomara Alonso flipped through Reader’s Digest one humid May night in 2004. The 50-year-old natural beauty with caramel hair sat alone on a suburban back patio. She couldn’t see the stars or sky. She longed for the space of her mountain farm in Venezuela and the high-ceilinged home she had…
The Wheels of Justice Filed under: Flotsam The other day, while whipping through the parking lot of the Miami-Dade State Attorney’s Office, Riptide came across a sleek egg-shape ride stamped with the unmistakable portrait of the county’s top crime fighter: Katherine Fernandez Rundle. Painted in a futuristic, fast-forward blue-and-white scheme,…
As the city of Denver gears up for the 2008 Democratic Convention, our sister paper the Denver Westword is running down profiles of all of the fifty states and their delegates. This week they turned their focus to Florida. Keep track of the Westword’s coverage of the convention, scheduled for…
After just four months, Alex Patout has left his postion as executive chef of the popular Christabelle’s Quarter in Coconut Grove. “It was an honest difference of opinion about the direction of the menu,” owner John El-Masry told me, and then quickly added words of respect for the departed Patout…
Photo by Jason Handelsman Watch a slideshow from the Carnival festivities. The vibe was different from the second we stepped foot on the upstairs platform at the Dadeland South Metrorail station. It was exceptionally crowded for a Sunday. Groups of excited bacchanalists were bedecked with bandanas patterned like island flags,…
The Chongalicious Girls — two very sweet teens from Krop High who became famous for their parody of a Miami cultural phenomenon — have finally released their new video. It’s titled “I’m in Love With a Chonga,” and unlike their first YouTube effort, this one is professionally produced. Enjoy: -Tamara…
Fred Flintstone would never make it in Miami. Nor would Ralph Cramden. See, bowling’s gone upscale. There was a time just a couple of years ago when you could drive north to Cloverleaf Lanes (on Northwest Second Avenue and 176th Street) or south to Don Carter Lanes (North Kendall Drive…
Incredible, edible, and now a Hallmark holiday The Egg News Media Hotline wants you to know that the ninth annual World Egg Day takes place this Friday, October 12th. Spearheading the festivities will be Howard Helmer, the Guinness World Record holder for “World’s Fastest Omelet Maker”. “There’s no better time…
The thought of sudsing up next to the guy lurking behind the paper stacks may make one a bit squeamish. But at least the dude scanning your ballpoint pens will smell fresh as a daisy. As part of a pitch to become Miami’s first retail building stamped with a U.S…
He’s free all right “LET THE FREE DUMB RUN.” A guy named Michael came by New Times’s offices yesterday with this photograph (presumably of himself) and a five-page typewritten note explaining his planned “Freedumb Run”: A personal patriot act. Sort of a cross bewteen Paul Revere and Lady Godiva minus…
