Drunk Florida Man Drifts a Mile Offshore on Pool Float

Being superdrunk and floating on an inflatable raft off Florida’s beaches is a time-honored tradition. It perfectly sums up the Sunshine State. Seriously, that ship on our state seal should be replaced with a drunk old guy in a Hawaiian shirt passed out on a neon-pink raft.Unfortunately, even some of the greatest things in…

Cash Rules Everything Around Miami-Dade Police

Mayor Alvarez’s former chief of staff, Dennis Morales, and several other high-ranking Miami-Dade Police officers flaunted rules related to outside employment and made hundreds of thousands of dollars each by consulting for a police force in Panama. [Herald]Meanwhile, Miami-Dade Police division chief Frank Vecin has retired following allegations that money…

ESPN Analyst Tweets LeBron James Leaving Cavs, Considering Heat

We have no idea how much to believe Jalen Rose, an ESPN analyst (read: not an actual reporter) and former player, but he Tweeted today that there’s no way LeBron James is returning to the Cleveland Cavaliers next season.#NBA BREAKING NEWS (research/sources say) It is almost CERTAIN that LEBRON JAMES…

World Cup 2010: U.S. vs. Algeria, Never Say Die!

Team USA is moving on the knockout round of the World Cup the only way America knows how – with drama and determination and come-from-behind heroics! After overcoming even more crappy FIFA officiating, an unyielding Algerian goalkeeper, England’s 1-0 win over Slovenia, goal differentials, and Koman Coulibaly’s asscrack call in…

Marlins Fire Manager Fredi Gonzalez and Two Other Coaches

Even after delivering a 10-4 win against the Baltimore Orioles last night, the Marlins have announced that they’ve fired manager Fredi Gonzalez and two other coaches: bench coach Carlos Tosca and hitting coach Jim Presley.”It is never easy to make a change in managers. Fredi has been with our club for…

One Arrested in Brutal Strip Club Beating, Four More Sought

Strip clubs should be happy places. Well, maybe not for the girls winding and grinding up on those polls (while they’re just hiding that pain deep in their souls), but for the dudes right? There’s boobs everywhere, shouldn’t they just be content to be chilling? Then why do so many…