When we last left the Bad Girls Club, somebody had put Miss Morgan’s crap on the porch, and she was freaking out that the other bitches “disrespected her and her shit.” And just like we expected (YES!), in last night’s Episode 2, Oxygen brings us back right when stripper Brandi…
[jump] Dear Sucker, I am glad you finally found someone you think is game, but I think you’re a little bit confused about the difference between “face-sitting” and “smothering.” While the two terms are often used interchangeably, strictly speaking, face-sitting is when a person squats above your face and demands…
Fashion Breakdown: Tasha: Dread extensions by Oopsie, fuchsia bra and fishnets, black corset vest, ultra-miniskirt, fury leg-warmers, platform boots. Oopsie: Goggles, color dreads, black spaghetti top, waist cincher, black miniskirt with hot-pink piping, fishnets, multicolor furry platform boots, and transparent plastic bag…
If you’re a total fiend for extreme art experiences, then you gotta drag your ass to O.H.W.O.W. this Friday night where a massive explosion of “Dadarhea” will be filling the gallery — and maybe even your mouth. Our official source (AKA the O.H.W.O.W. website) describes this imminent unnatural occurrence with…
California has already inspired the rest of the nation to ban plastic bags, get high for health, and allow (wo)man-on-(wo)man nuptials. And now a San Franciscan might inspire Miami to stop ignoring those who sleep on our streets.This Saturday, a traveling exhibit called “The Tenderloin Project” opens at Wynwood’s Butter…
The fine folks and dirty jokers over at the Comedy Inn have discovered a previously unknown permutation of the Perfect Friday Night. And it’s surprisingly simple: Pack a bunch of fun junkies into a cozy Quality Inn ballroom, get them really drunk on beer and booze from the open bar,…
Florida was America’s film capital until the Puritanical residents of Jacksonville ran those industry heathens out to California in the 1920s. But Miami knows how to treat those denizens of debauchery, which is why they keep coming back to Miami to film movies. In Celluloid City, we spotlight some of…
Without fail, every time we’re getting down at a club, there’s always a hard-core group of dancers, that get up in each other faces until a giant dance battle breaks out. We try to hold back our boyfriend, but he’s all “Naw, I can’t let them disrespect.” Next thing we…
The optic nerve dispatches information from your retina to your brain, a function that is entirely physiological and unless you suffer from psychosis, not open to interpretation. However, the films at Friday night’s Optic Nerve Film Festival touched upon both our intellects and emotions. And one film in particular –…
How real is your drag? How hot are your rags? How tight is your footwork? No doubt, you can’t touch the high queeniness of ladies like Pepper LaBeija, Dorian Corey, Octavia St. Laurent, Anji Xtravaganza, and Willi Ninja. In the late ’80s, non-filmmaker Jennie Livingston documented the drag balls of…
This past Saturday, as we stood outside the Bill Cosford Cinema waiting for Everything Is Terrible’s 2Everything 2Terrible: Tokyo Drift, we were extra curious to see who would turn up for this exercise in awkwardness. When we spied a few senior citizens in sweater sets, we wanted to throw trench…
OK, we know she isn’t an unfunny asshole. In fact, no matter how much we want to call her nasty names, Kathy Griffin seems pretty goddamn delightful. But we’re hurt. The Emmy-winning comedian will be in town this Wednesday at Hard Rock Live and we had been giddy with excitement at…
Monday – Sunday: With all the attention to The Heat Lightning’s Jersey Shore sock puppets, maybe you should check out more softies (and hardies) at Broward’s Bear + Bird Gallery. “Peculiar Playmates: Curious Sculptural Artworks,” which opened this past weekend, includes handmade oddities, including stuffed softies and ceramic figurines that…
[jump] Name: Dub Mandi. Profession: Musician and bartender. Describe your style in three words: Camo-rrific! Where do you bartend? Kill Your Idol.Why three belts? Why not!…
If you ever wanted to have the Miami New Times available at your fingertips at any time, your prayers have been answered. Now available as a free download, the New Times app for your iPhone or iPod Touch brings you everything you love about New Times on the go. Available…
Everybody needs love. But sometimes other human beings are way more trouble than they’re worth. There could be other problems, too. Like maybe your boyfriend’s body just isn’t boxy enough to satisfy your deep desire for smooth, flat surfaces and sharp penetrating corners. Or maybe you’re just really bored. In…
Now you can whore along with the cast of the Jersey Shore as they drag their STDs through South Beach. (What? Too harsh?) Our friends over at The Heat Lightning whipped up these fantastic Jersey Shore sock puppets. Check out the cleave on JWoww. Although her dress needs to be…
It was the full-bodied movements of those bare-breasted women that first lit Njeri Plato-Dioubate’s long-term love affair with West African dance. And it was enough to convince the Trinidad-born performer, who had previously focused on Caribbean folklore dancing, to permanently change course. “It just captured me,” says Plato-Dioubate. She remembers…
Once, in the ’80s, we starred in a DIY inspirational video where making waffles was a metaphor for career success. We thought the death of the VHS format meant the evidence would eventually disintegrate in some faraway Salvation Army. Yet there’s a group of seven friends that searches for cringe-worthy…
FridayWe warned you about the limited seating, and yes, both screenings of the Optic Nerve festival are sold out. But maybe you can go and just hover outside MOCA to absorb some video art vibes?A comedy show in a roadside motel? Miami, we are falling back in love with you…
[jump] Name: Marcus Blake, AKA Sosablack.Occupation: Rebel, host of the Vagabond’s Stone Groove.Describe your style in three words: Electric Miami Vice.What’s Stone Groove? Miami expressing itself at its rawest point. …
Thanks to the recent show at the Arsht Center, whenever we hear the word babalú, we flashback to I Love Lucy reruns and Ricky Ricardo beating on his conga drums. What we don’t think of is a luxury drugstore. But thanks to a new store opening on Lincoln Road, you…
