Styx Rocks On, and Hell Is Jealous

Down in the great, dark marsh of Hell, the river Styx flows ever hateful. But, the band Styx is alive and well on the SS Comeback Tour, and it just keeps “Sailin’ On.” The dudes of Styx have “Too Much Time On Their Hands” to worry about drowning in the…

Commission Position

Remember the 2002 movie Adaptation? It starred Nicolas Cage and Meryl Streep, who were both nominated for Academy Awards for their performances. The film was based on Susan Orlean’s non-fiction novel The Orchid Thief, which addressed the arrest of John Laroche and a group of Seminoles in South Florida for…

Green Day

St. Patrick’s Day: It’s the gnarliest Irish Catholic holiday in the liturgical calendar. Forget fasting; March 17 is all about feasting on shepherd’s pie and cheap green beer till you’re projectile puking emerald-colored chunks of bad decisions. In Coral Gables, however, the St. Patrick’s Day Celebration is less about getting…

Get Happy

The white picket fence needs a paint job. Gas prices are soaring through the roof. The cheeseball squalor of your living room is in dire need of some cheering up. No worries. Get a fresh take on a better way of life beginning at 6 p.m. during the free Second…

Come Sail Away

Styx was onto something when it recorded “Come Sail Away” in 1977. There’s nothing better than setting “an open course for the virgin sea” and searching for “tomorrow on every shore.” It’s quite liberating being a captain. Naturally — or shall we say nautically —we’re wet with excitement about this…

First in Fests

Working together under the banner of Qool Shows, Miami promoters Oski Gonzalez and the pseudonymous “Queen of the Scene” specialize in shows that go big. Since they met via MySpace five years ago, the two longtime local music lovers have specialized in multi-stage, all-local festivals. The fests usually follow a…

All of the Lights

Sure, there’ll be lights, and you can probably even expect a camera or two. But at the Miami International Film Festival, it’s all about the action. Hot, steamy film action — sometimes sweet, sometimes dirty, and always rare and exotic. More than 100 films will screen Friday through March 11,…

Dale, It’s Dali

The historic Moore Building (4040 N.E. 2nd Ave., Miami) is one of the most alluring and architecturally surreal buildings in our Magic City. The venue transports you to a forgotten classical era. It was built in 1920, just as a young Salvador Dali was leading the Dada movement towards Surrealism…

Ghetto Booty-Poppin’

Perhaps one of the most versatile actor/comedians of our time, John Leguizamo is performing live on stage at The Fillmore (1700 Washington Ave., Miami Beach) this weekend. He’s the lisping Sid we know from Ice Age and the sassy Miss Chi Chi Rodriguez we love from To Wong Foo: Thanks…

Come Together

The late Celia Cruz said it best: “Quimbara quimbara quma quimbamba/Quimbara quimbara quma quimbamba/Ee mama, ee mama/Ee Mama, ee Mama.” Rough translation: Get ready for Miami’s biggest party, Calle Ocho (SW 8th ST between 11-27th Ave, Little Havana). Celebrating its 35th year, Calle Ocho continues to be one of the…

Mais Oui

Those crazy Frenchmen. So angsty. So amorous. So delicate, and yet so egotistical. Don’t believe the stereotypes? Go see The Conquest, director Xavier Durringer’s ripped-from-the-headlines tale of French President Nicolas Sarkozy’s rise to power. The film addresses everything you’ve heard about the politician: the womanizing, the political trickery, the confrontations…

Violence Unseen

Much like Goya observing the sleep of reason, Juan Manuel Echavarría remains committed to exploring the tortured history of social injustice in his own country. In 2006, the Colombian artist established the Fundación Puntos de Encuentro (FPDE) a non-profit organization devoted to exhibiting art-related projects that preserve the historical memory…

Don’t Cry for Me, Argentina

At press time, thanks to Jeremy Lin-sanity, the New York Knicks are outselling Madonna in ticket sales. But here in the 305, possibly in an effort to prove just how little of a damn we give, Wednesday has been designated an unofficial day for celebrating the pop queen in all…

Chicago Noir

In Keith Huff’s critically acclaimed play A Steady Rain, Joey and Denny are longtime partners on the Chicago police force. And the two lifelong friends are both totally screwed up in their own way. Joey is an introverted drunk who is secretly in love with Denny’s wife, while Denny is…

Beach Bodies and Beats

As far as Miami circuit parties go, Winter Party is the best. And after almost a week’s worth of events, what better to way to show your pride (and raise money for the National Gay and Lesbian Task Force) than to keep on partying? It’s Sunday’s Winter Party Beach Party…

Art, Film, and Booze

During Art Basel, everyone likes to pretend it’s all about the art, but we know better. It’s about the easy-on-the-eyes guys and gals, the parties, and, most importantly, the booze. Nothing makes contemporary art seem more tolerable than your favorite libation. That’s why we are not going to try to…

Love the Way They Move

To call Pilobolus a dance troupe is far too limiting — the members of this exhilarating and popular company are acrobats, dancers, and athletes who pull off feats of movement that border on the impossible. They mount each other and form pyramids and other physical structures, create spasms in their…

Flamenco On Top

That the Flamenco Festival Miami 2012 returns to the Adrienne Arsht Center for the Performing Arts (1300 Biscayne Blvd., Miami) for the fifth time on Friday and Saturday says something about the newfound popularity of Spain’s most famous dancing export. Starting off on the streets of Andalusia, the form was…

Mastermind 2012 Finalist: Agustina Woodgate

Miami New Times’ Mastermind Awards honors the city’s most inspiring creatives. As we approach Artopia, our annual arts soiree where we’ll announce the three Mastermind winners March 8, we’re profiling each of our nine 2012 finalists. For tickets and more information about Artopia, visit the website.Agustina WoodgateIn perhaps the most…

Lessa: Funky Boho Fashion

Fashion Breakdown: Dress and vest from Montreal Heritage Boutique; moccasins bought online; purse from thrift shop in Sarasota; Rayban glasses are knock offs…