Everyone already hates Marco Rubio, from Tea Party activists who think his immigration bill is too liberal to LGBT activists who think it’s too conservative. So why not alienate Cuban voters too? This seems like a surefire way to piss off Miami exilios at least. Rubio now says Cubans’ 47-year-old…
In Europe, it’s not uncommon to sign promising kids to pro contracts well before their voice changes. Real Madrid signed a 7-year-old prodigy a couple of years ago, and Arsenal supposedly talked about giving a youth contract to former star Robin van Persie’s 5-year-old kid, the spectacularly named Shaqueel Van…
When House speaker Will Weatherford last month blocked a bid for taxpayer-supported renovations at Sun Life Stadium, Dolphins owner Stephen Ross all but promised he’d find a way to have the politician’s job, ominously predicting that “this decision will follow Speaker Weatherford for many years to come.” Now it looks…
It’s been a good while since Fidel Castro had the chance to really poke a big stick into Uncle Sam’s eyeball. That’s why Edward Snowden, the NSA leaker on the run from espionage charges, might just be the perfect early 87th birthday present for El Comandante. Snowden holed up in…
OK, so Channel 10’s snafu last night doesn’t rise halfway to the level of the Miami Herald running an ad two years ago congratulating the Heat for winning a title the morning after a brutal loss to the Dallas Mavericks. But still, guys, check those graphics before you go live…
You’re a freshly crowned, back-to-back NBA champ. The world is your oyster, and you’re in one of the greatest party cities on Earth. Where do you live it up? LeBron, D-Wade, Ray Allen, and Udonis Haslem all celebrated their new rings at Story Nightclub in South Beach, dancing onstage with…
Listen, America: We agree with you. Every single person who filed out of the AA Arena early last night and missed Ray Allen’s Planet Earth-shattering three-pointer deserves all the shame heaped upon them. Each and every Heat “fan” who then tried to elbow their way back into the arena when…
We get it, Department of Justice. You’ve been pretty busy, between going after Apple for its criminal eBooks and spending $58 million on really important junkets and all. But it’s pushing two-and-a-half years since then-Miami Police Chief Miguel Exposito called his cops “predators” on camera and instituted new policies that…
As the U.S. Senate’s immigration overhaul has inched forward, shepherded by our own Sen. Marco Rubio, South Floridians have hotly debated the most contentious issues: English-speaking requirements for immigrants, long wait periods for citizenship, a ban on LGBT benefits. But it seems we’ve ignored a silent threat tucked into the…
As the Senate wrangles over a compromise immigration reform bill — pushed in large part by our own Marco Rubio — a new poll suggests a huge majority of Floridians are eager to see any path to citizenship opened for immigrants. The poll finds 71 percent of Floridians back the…
Every right-thinking American who’s not a local municipal bean counter knows that red-light cameras are a total scam. Numerous studies have suggested they actually make intersections less safe, and last month a Tampa TV station even found proof that Florida had covertly changed the rules to allow shorter yellow-light times…
As if getting pounded 10-1 last night by the Milwaukee Brewers to keep the worst record in baseball wasn’t bad enough for the Marlins, a Miami police officer shot and critically wounded a man just outside the ballpark shortly after the game began. The shooting, which was related to a…
Jimmy Kimmel’s “Lie Witness News” travels the nation, asking bullshit questions to our least knowledgeable residents so we can all point and laugh at them. Last night, the crew came to Miami to ask Heat fans about topics like backup point guard MuShu Pork, three-point shooter Lando Calrissian, and of…
In 2011, he brought the Sexy Sax Man to a city commission meeting, pot decriminalization to the debate, and a surprising 23 percent of voters to the polls. Steve Berke, a comedian and YouTube marijuana advocate, came in second to incumbent Matti Herrera Bower in that campaign. Now, with Bower…
Sixteen months ago, a Miami teenager carrying a cell phone, a pack of Skittles, and a soft drink was shot to death in his father’s Central Florida town by a self-appointed neighborhood watchman. The case soon erupted into a referral on race — because the victim, Trayvon Martin, was black…
Miami has a long, proud history of granting civic immortality to our scummiest citizens, from naming a street after a Hialeah sugar company run by a former coke smuggler to UM’s increasingly embarrassing Alex Rodriguez Park to the long-lost Jose Canseco Street in Westchester. The latest flap over naming rights…
Mario Chalmers’ Dad Sued for Stealing Sports Agent’s Information
David Beckham was there. So was Justin Bieber, who dressed like a leather daddy to celebrate the return of Arrested Development. But of all the famous faces who peppered the crowd at last night’s Game Seven against Indiana, it was Flo Rida, his gigantic Jesus piece, and his manager who…
It’s the first Monday of hurricane season, which means all across the Sunshine State thousands are heading into work with the vague feeling they’ve forgotten something important (PSSST! Hurricane supplies, people. Specifically: vodka and board games.). Well, here’s a kick in the ass to get that kit together: Storms brewing…
Miami Heat point guard Mario Chalmers is known for his steals. Thanks to quick hands and crafty defense, he was near the top of the league with 118 on the court this year. Chalmers’ dad, meanwhile, excelled at a very different kind of theft, at least according to a local…
This much is clear: there’s something about gyrating ladies in South American clubs that drives all common sense right out of U.S. government officials’ heads. We’re just past the one year anniversary of the infamous Secret Service agents at a Colombian brothel incident, and now we’ve got a new tawdry…
