It’s the perfect time to count our blessings as Heat fans.

The Heat, Dolphins, and Hurricanes all got a heaping scoop of potluck revenge at the hands of players who once led those teams.

When the Miami Heat traded Hassan Whiteside to the Portland Trail Blazers for Meyers Leonard and Mo Harkless this offseason, most observers outside Miami saw the move as a loss that was an unfortunate necessity so the Heat could afford adding Jimmy Butler in free agency.

Last week, the San Francisco 49ers lost 27-24 to the Seattle Seahawks in overtime on Monday Night Football. You’re probably wondering what that fact has to do with you. Well, if you’re a Miami Dolphins fan, it has everything to do with you because the 49ers were the last remaining undefeated team in the NFL for the 2019-20 season, meaning, once again, the 1972 Dolphins stand as the only undefeated team in NFL history.

Following a 0-7 start to the season, everything recently had turned to butterflies, lollipops, bubbles, and rainbows for the Miami Dolphins thanks to straight wins over the New York Jets and Indianapolis Colts. Head coach Brian Flores got a celebratory Gatorade shower after the Jets game, and Dolphins players no one had ever heard of got interviews with ESPN after the Fins pulled off a surprise win over the Colts last week.

After the Miami Dolphins’ back-to-back wins against the New York Jets and Indianapolis Colts, it’s clear the dream that was drafting Alabama quarterback Tua Tagovailoa with the first-overall pick is over. The Dolphins, now 2-7, are almost assuredly eliminated from the #TankForTua sweepstakes.

Miami Heat fans, like Miamians in general, are an eclectic bunch. No fan base is more diverse in just about every way. From age to race to social class, Heat fans come in a multitude of shapes and sizes that make them one of the most misunderstood and unpredictable fan bases in any sport.

Before the Miami Heat took on the Los Angeles Lakers Friday night, the team announced Dion Waiters, who has yet to set foot on the court for the team this season, would be inactive. That wasn’t weird at all.

College football is celebrating its 150th anniversary this year, and in commemoration, ESPN has unveiled a list of the 150 greatest games in college football history. Throughout the list are games that have shaped the fabric of college football and made it what it is today.

Being a Miami Heat fan is like spending a day off work at the beach — even on the rainiest days, it doesn’t suck. A Heat fan’s floor for basketball enjoyment throughout a season is most NBA fans’ ceiling. The team’s hot start this season once again proves something fans could have told everyone a long time ago: The Miami Heat is the greatest organization in the NBA.

Saturday afternoon, the Miami Hurricanes went to Tallahassee and demolished the Florida State Seminoles 27-10. Nine sacks against FSU and some well-timed dime passes from UM quarterback Jarren Williams sealed a third straight win over Miami’s biggest rival. Much fun was had in the state capital at the Seminoles’ expense.

Bad takes — they happen to the best of us. There is literally an entire Twitter account dedicated to getting a good chuckle at how wrong we all are when it comes to sports opinions. Sometimes, though, a take is so predictably bad, so outrageously hideous, that when said take inevitably fires backward we must, by Twitter law, gather together to point it out.

Dolphins fans have to be asking themselves where this franchise went wrong. Not so much why the team is 0-7 this season — because it’s rather obvious that was the plan — but more so, how it’s come to this.

When the Miami Dolphins face the Pittsburgh Steelers tonight, much airtime will likely be dedicated to the fact that the matchup marks be the first time Minkah Fitzpatrick, the Dolphins’ 2018 first-round pick, will face his former team since forcing a trade earlier this season.

Wednesday night, fans were introduced to the 2019-20 Miami Heat. There were T-shirt cannons, a pre-tip Justise Winslow speech, a new introduction video, and, uh, holy shit, like an entire roster of new-ish players who are apparently all going to win Rookie of the Year.

Whomever you pray to or worship, thank it/he/she/they for the many blessings that have arrived today: The Miami Heat is officially back in our lives.

The Dolphins lost another football game yesterday, this time 31-21 to the Buffalo Bills. Rather than boring you with all of the statistics and takes about whether it’s good the Dolphins moved to 0-6 this season, we’ll just present video evidence of how Miami bookended the game with two of the worst football plays you’ll ever see.

Perhaps you’ve seen it in the newspapers, but for those who just returned from a backpacking trip through the Amazon, we have some very sad and unfortunate news: The 2019 Miami Dolphins are a hideous football team with which you should under no circumstances make eye contact.

Perhaps those hundred or so games Dwyane Wade played with the Chicago Bulls and Cleveland Cavaliers from 2016 to 2018 have prepared Miami Heat fans for life without the franchise’s greatest star. Maybe Wade’s incredible farewell season and the fact he had nothing left to prove or accomplish will lessen the sting a bit.

Yesterday the Miami Dolphins played arguably the most important game at Hard Rock Stadium since, well, when was El Clásico? Fans were treated to a textbook showdown between two winless teams that were maybe, probably, arguably trying to out-suck each other in what can only be referred to as the 2019 Tank Bowl.

Outside of his family, friends, and Miami Heat fans, there is no one on Earth who loves Dwyane Wade more than his former coworkers. Wade is adored by just about everyone who came into contact with him during his 15 seasons with the Heat, from longtime teammates to the coaching staff to the broadcast team.

Perhaps you have heard the news — the Miami Dolphins are *not* having a superfantastic football season. They are not the greatest football team, and they most definitely are not moving the ball from goal to goal like no one has ever seen.