The Florida Republican Party’s attacks on Andrew Gillum will fall into two categories. GOP gubernatorial nominee Ron DeSantis has already resorted to outright racism. Yesterday on Fox News, he was either intentionally using the word “monkey” to describe Gillum or was just too stupid to know the word’s offensive history with black people — a hard excuse to believe from a Harvard- and Yale-educated lawyer.
After last night’s primary results made it official, Floridians assumed newly minted GOP gubernatorial candidate Ron DeSantis, a Confederate-flag bumper-sticker come to life, would run a wild, dog-whistling, and entirely Trumpian campaign against Democrat Andrew Gillum. But people perhaps didn’t expect DeSantis to start throwing around racial slurs this early…
The running joke among Florida political journalists is that the state’s inept Democratic Party runs a centrist from Tampa every single year for governor. The past few decades of Democratic gubernatorial candidates have been milquetoast centrists who love palling around with their Republican colleagues in Tallahassee and sharing stories about staggering home from bars during their time at FSU. Florida, it seems, does not create populist firebrands.
By 7 p.m., Floridians will know whether their usually inept state Democratic Party has chosen to anoint a hard-campaigning progressive with popular, grassroots support; a rich dude with a checkered track record as Miami Beach mayor; or a well-connected but boring centrist former congresswoman as the party’s next gubernatorial candidate…
Go vote today in Miami if you can. Please. It’s primary day, and there are many, many awful people in Florida whose goal in life is to set up roadblocks between you and your constitutional right to cast a ballot. Crooks and fools often win elections in South Florida by small handfuls of votes, and old, reactionary nutjobs have been voting early for weeks already…
Donald Trump is, contrary to his own daily assurances, despised by those around him. His White House is a cesspool of cynical weasel-people sniping at one another in the press and ratting him out to federal law enforcement. His own kids barely like him. His business acquaintances in Miami apparently share that feeling…
Voting in Miami is, more often than not, the act of choosing the lesser of multiple morons to represent your interests in public office. Sure, some candidates are actually cool, but way more Miami politicians are bald-faced crooks, appalling idiots, outright racists, or a combination thereof.
Ex-Miami Mayor Tomás Regalado now runs the U.S. Office of Cuba Broadcasting, a federal agency that creates pro-American “news” and blasts it in the vague direction of Cuba. It would be perhaps inaccurate to say the OCB’s stations — Radio Martí, TV Martí, and Martí Noticias — “broadcast” in Cuba,…
Miami-Dade County Administrative Law Judge Timothy Maher was arrested last week for reportedly threatening to shoot his family members in his El Portal home. Then, yesterday, Maher allegedly threatened to kill someone at his federal office, which handles disability and Social Security cases. Maher’s threat was serious enough that the Federal Protective Service evacuated the building.
Social media fame is a race to the bottom. Concepts that seem novel one day get chewed up, memed, and worn out in days in a brutal system that ensures only the most outrageous, shameless people are able to achieve sustained fame. Alex Jones has millions of followers. People think the QAnon conspiracy is real. Teen rapper Tay-K scored a massive hit after writing a song about his capital murder charges.
South Florida’s Big Cypress National Preserve is aptly named for its abundance of large cypress trees. The 720,000-acre stretch of land is one of the last few large chunks of protected Everglades wetland in South Florida — but thanks to a web of nefarious, manmade problems, the site will likely look very different within the next 50 years.
Most of Florida East Coast Railway’s train tracks in Miami-Dade County pass through highly populated urban areas. If a gigantic tanker of liquid natural gas were to spill, ignite, or explode, it’s fair to assume a lot of homes or innocent people would stand in harm’s way. But according to multiple public documents the watchdog news site Florida Bulldog dug up this morning, the railroad has already been transporting liquid natural gas (LNG) tankers through Miami-Dade to PortMiami and Hialeah.
Pythons are not supposed to be in the Everglades. The snakes likely got there because some Florida creep with way too many pet reptiles let them loose in the Glades in the 1980s. Now the dang things are eating everything and are so unstoppable that the state occasionally encourages random hunters…
By nearly every metric, Miami’s housing and rental markets are Kafkaesque nightmares. Few people can afford their homes here because they are expensive, while median incomes are embarrassingly low. It’s a dangerous predicament — one natural disaster could throw tons of cash-strapped homeowners spiraling into bankruptcy.
Whether or not Donald Trump colluded with Russian agents, there’s no doubt Moscow is running a sophisticated online campaign to sow dissent in America. Robert Mueller has already indicted numerous Russian agents for using Facebook to meddle in the 2016 election, and journalists have clearly spelled out how Vladimir Putin’s Internet Research Agency manipulates the web.
From 1992 through 1998, Bruno Barreiro served in the Florida House of Representatives. From 1998 until this year, he was a Miami-Dade County commissioner. In that time, Barreiro did such a remarkably poor job, was so universally reviled, and was so routinely ridiculed for being a dunce that the Miami Herald…
Another day, another South Florida cop suing his department because he feels persecuted for being white. Poor guy. In the latest case filed in Miami-Dade court last week, Miami Gardens Police Officer William Dunaske sued the force for “anti-white” harassment. The twist: Dunaske has repeatedly been accused of racism and abuse, and he filed the suit after a fight over why he had named his dog after a black officer in the department.
Florida, Jeff Greene wants to be your next governor. This will perhaps be a difficult accomplishment for Greene, because, and this is key, he appears to be a massive idiot. A huge, honking stooge. Just a grade-A fool-boy. Despite being a billionaire, or perhaps due to the fact that he is filthy rich, Greene appears to have legit zero idea…
Boca Raton’s private-prison juggernaut, the GEO Group, makes more money from Immigration and Customs Enforcement contracts than any other company in America. The company has been repeatedly sued for allegedly forcing immigrant detainees to work for food and itself has threatened to sue critics for protesting the company. Earlier this month, a fringe white-supremacist group, Identity Evropa, showed up at an ICE facility in Colorado and handed the workers there a thank-you card and gift basket.
There Joe Carollo is, caught in a grainy image like he’s some unholy cryptid combination of Bigfoot, Angela Lansbury, and Alex Jones. The fact that the photo is low-res and black-and-white somehow makes it more compelling. Look at how his eyes glow like he’s the Loch Ness monster, but with a forged private detective’s license.
The utterly bizarre and horrid tale of Pennsylvania-turned-Florida-turned-Cuban priest George Zirwas has taken an even darker turn this week. More than 15 years ago, New Times published a meticulously reported feature delving into Zirwas’ 2001 murder in Havana, where he was injected in the neck with an overdose of muscle relaxant…
There’s good reason Miami’s former mayor earned the nickname “Crazy Joe” Carollo. So when voters elected him to the city commission last fall, it’s no surprise he brought that gravitational mass of insanity back to Dinner Key. Now Carollo is allegedly harassing his enemies in parking lots at 1:30 in the morning and yelling, “I am the law!” when confronted. Good job, everyone!
