Gather Around Your Morons of the Week

It’s once again that time of the week– when a bearded, wild-eyed Riptide climbs down from that mountaintop hoisting stone tablets bearing the names of the last seven day’s most elite numbskulls. Without further ado, your morons of the week: 5. The city of Haikou It’s being called the “Miami…

No Gold Statuettes Here: Welcome to the Morons of the Week

Sorry Joan Rivers, but we like our award recipients unwashed, uncouth, and unwilling. Let’s go to the red carpet of regional idiocy! 3. The Proposed Don’t-Feed-The-Homeless Rule We don’t usually give these awards to policies, but this clinched it: Though the change could draw objections, David Karsh, spokesman for Development…

Update: Pastor Gaston Smith Avoids Prison Time

No prison time! See below for update.This is the day of reckoning for Liberty City’s most well-known pastor. Rev. Gaston Everett Smith, head of the Friendship Baptist Missionary Church, will be sentenced for blowing county grant funds on personal expenses. He could face five years in prison, but will likely…

The Mermelstein Files: The Cocaine King’s Letter to Nancy Reagan

This week, New Times published “I, Max,” a feature story revealing what became of former Medellin Cartel master-smuggler Max Mermelstein after he decided to cooperate with feds and entered the Witness Protection Program. We’ve obtained documents, many of them never before published, related to the underground informant.In February, 1987, Max…

The Mermelstein Files: Max Testifies in Front of Joe Biden

This week, New Times presents “I, Max,” a feature story revealing what became of Medellín Cartel master smuggler Max Mermelstein after he cooperated with feds and entered the Witness Protection Program. We’ve obtained documents, some of them never before published, related to the underground informant.On August 17, 1989, underground smuggler-turned-informant…