We can bitch and complain all we want about our laborious weekdays at work, but when it comes to the weekend, the bitching needs to stop. Ain’t nobody got time fo’ anything besides chocolate festivals, beer festivals, and Calle Ocho. So quit your complaining and start planning your sure-to-be-awesome weekend…
The debate over whether the best meal of the day is lunch or breakfast has been going on for millennia. Intense battles have broken out over the issue. But one day, a peaceful being came up with a compromise for the rivaling sides. The settlement was “brunch,” a perfect middleman…
What a bunch of assholes! Serving celebratory specials for the death of a human being? Well, not really. Hugo Chávez may have personified heartache and headache to millions of Venezuelan citizens, immigrants, and their U.S.-born descendants, but to say we’re celebrating his demise would be horrifically offensive. However, the socialist…
We can call vegans a lot of things: weirdly connected to the planet, strangely into fake cheese, but this really takes the dairy-and-egg-free cake. Naked vegan cooking is a thing now where vegans take pictures of themselves cooking vegan dishes in their birthday suits. Sometimes they’re alone; sometimes they’re in…
The ReviewerCard belongs to folks who want to receive better and/or comped services. Anyone can apply for membership, but everyone must go through a rigid background check first — you know, to make sure you’re not taking advantage or anything…
You’d think food bloggers’ jobs would be easy. Go out, eat, write. Go out, eat, write. Drink, go out, drink, write, drink. It’s kind of not like that at all. We spend more time running around the city than we do actually sitting at a table and eating. A perfect…
Were y’all at Artopia last night? No? Missed out. No, really. There was an almost-uncomfortable amount of booze and shiny spandex going around — almost-uncomfortable. Anyway, you can totally make up for it this weekend (though we won’t forgive you too soon because Artopia was a New Times event). Lots to…
You know, we here at New Times are always looking for ways to spit, polish, and shine up our sites to provide you with a better news-seeking experience. We know, that makes us really awesome, but beyond that, it makes you awesome for keeping up with us. Where can you…
Event recaps can be super repetitive sometimes. Unless something über spectacular happened, they’re usually predictable. SO WE’RE ABOUT TO CHANGE THAT, Y’ALL! In the spirit of all things good and fun, we popped around from booth to booth at Thrillist’s BBQ & The Blues last night hosted by none other…
Victory is sweet for those who’ve patiently waited for the spotlight. Bobby Flay threw an accomplished fist in the air as Rachael Ray announced the people’s choice first place winner — his green chile burger won. The burger, which Flay made in the name of his New Jersey restaurant, Bobby’s…
Lawdy, lawdy. The weekend has already exhausted us and it hasn’t even started. WTF? We’re supposed to have these days to relax. If you’re headed to Festival events, there’ll be no relaxing for you. But if you’re not, you’ll surely need a couple things to do away from the beach…
Listen, we have a problem. As we milled around the beachside tents of Moët Hennessy’s The Q last night, we noticed salt and pepper shakers on each of the tables. Yeah, salt and pepper shakers. You know, like the kind people put in the middle of a family dinner table…
For more on the South Beach Wine & Food Festival, check out New Times’ Taste guide, hitting newsstands Thursday, February 21. Think about the last time you shared a bottle of vino with friends. Unless you’re a group of uppity wine connoisseurs or sommeliers, chances are the wine in your…
Like free stuff? Course ya do. Like winning? Probably more than getting free stuff. That’s why we’re bunching the two together and giving you a chance to win two tickets to Trade Talks 2013. The SoBeWFF satellite event will give you the chance to rub elbows and speak candidly with…
Disney World: Where dreams come true. Florida: Where dreams of equal marriage are crushed. Well, for now, at least. Ah, Florida… we have such a happy place nestled right in the bosom of our state, but all around us, gay couples are advocating for the right to marry. How can…
Can’t make it to this year’s South Beach Wine & Food Festival? We hear ya. Tickets are kind of expensive. Fret not. Luckily, Twitter allows complete strangers to pry into the lives of those who live publicly, like Cooking Channel and Food Network idols, for instance. This year, experience SoBe…
For more on the South Beach Wine & Food Festival, check out New Times’ Taste guide, hitting newsstands Thursday, February 21. As human beings, we are subject to the undeniable laws of attraction. If something looks good, we gotta have it. And if you’ve got an interest in food, neck-breaking…
There is nothing else in the world that can beat a delicious Cuban sangwich. EXCEPT for one thing. Free Cuban sangwiches. That’s right. Gratis. Calle Ocho’s favorite ventanita, Versailles, is teaming up with Smithfield (as in, the ham people) and they’re giving away free Cuban sandwiches from midnight until 2…
The day after one of the most commercialized dates of the year always seems like a bit of a dud. A joy-kill, if you will. But thanks to Short Order, you can virtually omit all the love drama from your life and start planning your weekend. The forecast says it’s…
Happy February 15th, y’all! If you spent last night cold and alone with no one to keep you company except a box of Franzia and the sad songs of Billy Joel, congratulations! You made it through the night. But if you’re “happily” attached, hopelessly in love, or otherwise socially conditioned…
Welcome to our newest series called Short Order’s Weekly Bites. (Tentative name) Every Thursday, we’ll use Short Order’s highly scientific formula to bring you the five most important restaurant industry figures of the week. The formula, which we cannot disclose unless you have in your possession a vile of the…
Sometimes, dinners are meant to splurge on. It’s a once-a-year thing when you can eat to your heart’s content without a worry greater than getting spinach in your teeth. (Don’t fret, there’s not much spinach on these menus.) Valentine’s Day is tomorrow — it’s time to step up to the…
