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Wait a Second, Are the Marlins Actually Good This Year?

Miami has the Dolphins Heat Marlins, the greatest baseball team? The Marlins 8-5 comeback victory over the Colorado Rockies Thursday afternoon means your favorite little local baseball club has started the season 3-1, their best start since they began the 2009 season 4-0. I don't know what to do with...
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Miami has the Dolphins Heat Marlins, the greatest baseball team? The Marlins 8-5 comeback victory over the Colorado Rockies Thursday afternoon means your favorite little local baseball club has started the season 3-1, their best start since they began the 2009 season 4-0. I don't know what to do with my hands.

The Marlins scored 27 runs over the course of the series versus the Rockies. After scoring a historically low 513 runs all of last season, 27 in a week has Miami Marlins fans wondering if this is real life. They haz baseball team? Can we touch it?

In addition to the hot bats in the first week, the Marlins pitchers have come out gassin'. Before the game Thursday Marlins pitchers had thrown a total of 96 pitches over 95 mph, the next closest club? The San Diego Padres with 36. Fast and Furi-fish? Yes, I just did that. No, I am not proud of it.

The fast start has everybody doing the fish (yeah, yeah, yeah), dreaming of a worst-to-first 2014 campaign. Yeah, I hear you negative Nelson. Sure it was the Rockies, and they were only mildly less crappy than the Marlins last year, but can you blame Marlins fans for jumping on the first sign of optimism in awhile? No, you can't. So like, take your buzz kill face back to the, like, face store. Or something. Bub.

You never know what could happen, this Marlins team could be a cool story by years end. Hell, they have a third baseman that played in Japan last year. If that's not part of a terrifically terrible feel good baseball movie plot starring Kevin Costner playing an aging alcoholic catcher with an estranged wife, then I don't know what is.

Don't let those fools throw retractable roof shade on your shine, Marlins fans, soak it up. Get you some of those good feelies.

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