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The Definitive Ranking of Miami Heat Players We'd Most Like to Visit Disney With

Which player would you choose to accompany you on your dream Disney playdate?EXPAND
Which player would you choose to accompany you on your dream Disney playdate?
Photo by Doug Pensinger/Getty
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Even as the number of COVID cases in Florida skyrockets, the NBA seems intent on restarting its season on July 31 in Orlando. Teams including the Miami Heat are scheduled to stay at Disney resort hotels, with games being played at the Wide World of Sports complex.

The league is referring to this site as a "bubble" because few, if any, people not directly involved with NBA operations will be permitted in the area. No fans. No family for weeks. Just the players, coaches, staff, and some broadcast teams all alone at "the happiest place on earth."

Imagine if the NBA made an exception, though. Just for you. Just so you could spend one afternoon with your favorite Miami Heat player in the Magic Kingdom park.

Which player would you choose to accompany you on your dream playdate? We've ranked our choices.

13. Andre Iguodala. Undoubtedly, last. Iguodala seems like he would want no part of hanging out with a fan for six hours. If we're being completely honest, he barely seems all that interested in playing for the Miami Heat. It is likely you are reading this and completely forgot Iggy even plays for the Heat.

An entire day with Iguodala at Disney sounds like the most awkward blind date ever. Hard pass.

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happiness the best medicine. year 6.

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12. Solomon Hill. Another new member of the Miami Heat, Hill seems like a nice enough guy — we just don't know much about him. If we're ranking Heat players we'd most enjoy a day at Disney with, it would make sense if we've actually seen said player play for the Heat longer than 45 minutes.

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11. Jae Crowder. Noticing a trend here? Another guy the Heat had just acquired before all hell broke loose in life. Crowder was putting in work in his first moments as Heat player. On the bright side for Jae, if this was just a list of new Heat players we'd most like to go to Disney with, Crowder would rank first!

10. Derrick Jones Jr. It's going to be tough to choose which Heat players we'd most like to spend a day at Disney with. We'd like to spend a day in Orlando with all of them, really.

Someone has to lose out in these rankings, however, and in this particular scenario, we need to consider what we'll have to talk about. We'd definitely need to ride Soarin' with DJJ.

In the case of DJJ, how much time can you kill complimenting a guy on how high he jumps? It's also quite likely he's not a member of the Heat after this season, so we'd end up with memories of spending a day with the most overpaid Cleveland Cavalier in the end.

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9. Kendrick Nunn. We're still getting to know Kendrick Nunn, one of the best rookies to ever wear a Miami Heat uniform. He seems cool. He seems like he is a fantastic man to help bring Heat culture into 2030. All of that is great, but without knowing him more, he wouldn't be on the top of our Disney list.

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Stick to the plan

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8. Kelly Olynyk. Who knows? Maybe riding Splash Mountain with Olynyk would be a blast. Maybe five hours of eating mediocre barbecue with a seven-foot Canadian man would be great. It's possible.

7. Duncan Robinson. All we know about Duncan Robinson is his three-point shot is otherworldly and he has a Dunkin' Donuts sponsorship. He seems like a nice enough guy, though. I could have a great time eating ice cream at Disney with Duncan.

6. Chris Silva. Silva is famously from Gabon, Africa. His story is tremendous. The Heat created one of the best moments of the season by surprising him with a visit from his mother, whom he hadn't seen in years.

It's possible Silva has been to Disney already, but who knows. We'd have a good time showing him around.

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5. Tyler Herro. It's tough to remember that Tyler Herro just turned 20. He's basically a child. Many people reading this literally could be his father. I'm not sure if that makes a day at Disney with Herro better, but it definitely makes it different than an experience there with a guy like Dwyane Wade.

There would be so many Instagram photos of us together at Disney to memorialize the day. So much evidence we're cool.

4. Jimmy Butler. On his surface, Jimmy Butler doesn't seem like the most fun guy, but Heat fans have learned a lot about their newest star in his first season in Miami. Not only would Butler be more fun at Disney than we would have anticipated a few months ago, but he would also likely be the best person to be with if we got lost.

Jimmy seems like he would stay cool under pressure if a ride broke and we were stuck in the air. He would likely calm you down by telling you how much of a little bitch you were being.

3. Goran Dragic. What a treat this would be, right? A day alone at Disney with maybe the most lovable Miami Heat player of all time? Constant entertainment. We're also not sure Goran will be back with the Heat after this season, so this would be a nice farewell if he in fact leaves.

2. Udonis Haslem. A day at Disney with UD would be the highlight of any Miami Heat fan's life. There really aren't many Heat players we'd rather spend a day with anywhere, but an amusement park all by ourselves would be a treat that is hard to imagine.

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1. Bam Adebayo. There is no man on the Miami Heat roster that seems more like a big kid than Bam Adebayo. We can see him having a great day at the beach flying a kite or sliding down a playground slide for hours. Honestly, it makes no sense that he's only 22 years old. He looks 34 but acts 15.

If you asked us who we would most like to spend an entire day exploring Disney with, the choice would be Bam every time. He's a mix of Chris Bosh's personality and Alonzo Mourning's stature. He's the Miami Heat's newest star, but off the court, he just seems like a good time. 

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