Five Reasons the Miami Hurricanes' Season Has Been a Complete Disaster

Mark Richt
Mark Richt Courtesy of University of Miami Athletics Department
It's officially time to call it — the Miami Hurricanes 2018 are an unmitigated disaster. Sitting in fifth place in the ACC Coastal Division with four losses and a current Sports Illustrated prediction of a meeting with USF in the Gasparilla Bowl is enough. Little to nothing has gone right for the Hurricanes this year, and with two road games left against schools that have given the Canes a hard time in the past, it seems likely another L or two is on the way before the season mercifully concludes.

So much has gone wrong, in fact, that we've compiled a list. A beautiful list of terrible things we've placed in chronological order to best map out just how things went south for Miami this season.
Photo by Eric Espada / Miami Athletics
1. The Hurricanes redesigned the Turnover Chain. They should not have done that. Do you know why the saying goes "If it ain't broke, don't fix it"? It's because if something isn't broken, YOU DON'T FIX IT! The Canes' original Turnover Chain had great juju. Everyone loved it. It worked wonders for team morale and motivation. The Canes decided to throw away the old, original U design in favor of a blinged-out Sebastian the Ibis.

You never mess with the good juju. The Canes broke this rule, and it's undoubtedly the reason they stink this season. You can't say it isn't!

2. Mark Richt started the season with Malik Rosier. Mark Richt probably doesn't love himself some Malik Rosier, but it's pretty apparent he isn't a huge fan of redshirt freshman N'Kosi Perry, either. Richt decided this season would be best in the hands of Rosier, even as every Canes fan who watched the team lose the last three games of 2017 could have told him there was no reason to go back to the Rosier well.

Perry is an unknown, erratic young quarterback who can't be fully trusted. Perry is also not Malik Rosier and could have been a known commodity, good or otherwise, by now if the Canes had simply invested in him. He couldn't have possibly done worse than 5-4. Instead of the Canes knowing what they have in Perry, the team now sits in no-man's land, wondering what he is.

3. Mark Richt plays midseason quarterback hokey-pokey. After Rosier underperformed (shocker) and the fan clamor for Perry grew, a quarterback switch was finally made and Perry got his first shot at the big time against Florida State. All Perry did in that game was throw four touchdowns and lead the Canes to a frantic second-half comeback win.

That performance bought Perry, the possible quarterback of Miami's future, exactly 45 seconds. The minute Perry stepped in a pothole and had a bad moment, Richt pulled him and reinserted Rosier. Then the reverse happened. Then everything reversed again. In and out. Out and in. Perry and Rosier playing musical chairs. What a mess.

The result has been a team that has zero identity, no idea whether Perry is worthy of a 2019 shot, and, worst of all, a 5-4 record. Richt continues to say Rosier gives the Canes "the best chance to win"; then the Canes lose in a game where he quickly pulled Rosier.

Richt really messed around and crapped the bed on this one.

4. Mark Richt refuses to let someone else call the plays. The Canes have talent. They have athletes some of the schools they've lost to this season only dream of recruiting. Yet Miami could muster only a pathetic 12 points against Duke. DUKE! It's not good enough, and Richt must begin to realize his attention might be better directed elsewhere while someone else takes over the play-calling duties. Willie Taggart just made this difficult decision in his first year at FSU. It's not ideal, but it's worth a shot.

Richt clutching the play-call sheet after these results has been the worst thing to happen nine games into the season. Miami should be trying something new. Everyone knows the five plays Richt calls. They might work with guys like Todd Gurley and Matthew Stafford at Georgia, but they aren't working with Malik Rosier in Miami.

5. The Canes keep getting prime-time games; they do not want those things. Nobody sneaks up on anyone in a prime-time game. You get the other team's best shot. You get the drunkest college students. You get the bright lights and Braveheart atmosphere. None of that is good when you're a team that is struggling.

The last thing Miami needs is more road prime-time games. But it sure as hell looks like UM is about to get two more of them. The players shouldn't have to care about this, but here we are. Miami fans would normally love more prime-time games, but this season being a great rating sell has come back to haunt them.

Even when it's Duke at home, it's best if Miami plays at noon. This weekend in Atlanta and next week in Blacksburg are likely to be two more under-the-light tests for Miami. Not good. 
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Ryan Yousefi is a freelance writer for Miami New Times, a lover of sports, and an expert consumer of craft beer and pho. Hanley Ramirez once stole a baseball from him and to this day still owes him $10.