It's the last Friday of the month, which means traffic across town will come to a screeching halt as hundreds of cyclists commandeer the streets. It's Critical Mass, the one night every month when Miamians who hate cyclists are forced to shut up.
At 7:15 p.m., the ride will hit most of Miami's classic tourist destinations. After starting at Government Center in downtown, it will head northwest through the newly Zika-infested clouds of mosquitoes in Wynwood, hang a right onto NW 54th Street, shank left onto Biscayne Boulevard, and then cross into Miami Beach via the 79th Street Causeway.
From there, the ride will hang a right and snake all the way down Miami Beach along Indian Creek Drive and then cut across Dade Boulevard until it hits the Venetian Causeway. Once the ride reaches the mainland, it will loop back to Government Center, where everyone will presumably bike right back to Wynwood for beer.
Given the fact that you can now catch Zika from Wynwood mosquitoes, you should wear a helmet and bug spray for the duration of the ride.
Keep Miami New Times Free... Since we started Miami New Times, it has been defined as the free, independent voice of Miami, and we would like to keep it that way. Offering our readers free access to incisive coverage of local news, food and culture. Producing stories on everything from political scandals to the hottest new bands, with gutsy reporting, stylish writing, and staffers who've won everything from the Society of Professional Journalists' Sigma Delta Chi feature-writing award to the Casey Medal for Meritorious Journalism. But with local journalism's existence under siege and advertising revenue setbacks having a larger impact, it is important now more than ever for us to rally support behind funding our local journalism. You can help by participating in our "I Support" membership program, allowing us to keep covering Miami with no paywalls.