Keep your amateur stand-up routine for open mic night. You might bomb, but at least it's free.
Dr. Manuel Alvarado, a 60-year-old Venezuelan, decided to try his best comedy routine at Miami International Airport and now has to pay $89,000.
On October 22, Alvarado was joking around with a gate agent and said that he had C-4 explosives in his luggage. The gate agent did not take it as a joke.
Probably because a) that's not actually that funny; b) not joking about bombs in an airport is the number one rule of airports.
The incident lead to parts of MIA being shut down for several hours that day. Five separate airlines ended up having to cancel flights.
A Miami-Dade Police bomb squad was also deployed to search through the doctor's luggage and, of course, found nothing.
In exchange for not having formal charges filed, Alvarado's attorney worked out a deal. He'll pay up almost $84,000 to the airlines, with the rest of the $89,000 fine going to the Miami-Dade Police Department.
Alvarado also issued a formal written apology.
Please learn from Alvarado's mistakes: keep your dumb airport bits to airline food and how your arms are so tired.
Keep Miami New Times Free... Since we started Miami New Times, it has been defined as the free, independent voice of Miami, and we would like to keep it that way. Offering our readers free access to incisive coverage of local news, food and culture. Producing stories on everything from political scandals to the hottest new bands, with gutsy reporting, stylish writing, and staffers who've won everything from the Society of Professional Journalists' Sigma Delta Chi feature-writing award to the Casey Medal for Meritorious Journalism. But with local journalism's existence under siege and advertising revenue setbacks having a larger impact, it is important now more than ever for us to rally support behind funding our local journalism. You can help by participating in our "I Support" membership program, allowing us to keep covering Miami with no paywalls.