10. Red Nectar. Presented by Ladies Night. Wednesday, December 23, 10 p.m. Kill Your Idol, 222 Española Way, Miami Beach; 305-534-1009; facebook.com/killyouridolmiami. Admission is free. Ages 21 and up.
From folding denim at American Apparel to shredding it at a club near you, Red Nectar is on top of its game. Although the two-year-old band admits it's still "figuring out [its] sound," the indie-tinged fuzz rock crew feels at home in the Magic City. "The music scene in Miami is the strongest I've ever seen in many years," Red Nectar's designated shredder, Bernardo told New Times earlier this year. "Right now, music in Miami is very eclectic. You'll go to shows and see the entire musical spectrum in one night."
9. Christmas Dreaming with Matthew Dekay, Bakke, and Ms. Mada. Presented by Link Miami Rebels. Friday, December 25, 11 p.m. Trade, 1439 Washington Ave., Miami Beach; 305-531-6666; trademia.com. Tickets cost $10 to $15 plus fees via residentadvisor.net. Ages 21 and up.
Shiny lights and never-ending meals — we're all just Christmas Dreaming at this point. And this week, after you've feasted on all the lechón you can stomach, you can burn off those calories on the dance floor with techno beats from Matthew Dekay, Bakke, and Ms. Mada at Trade.
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8. Boxing Day Special with Anthony Naples, Diego, Uchi, and Chris Video. Presented by SAFE. Saturday, December 26, 10 p.m. The Electric Pickle, 2826 N. Miami Ave., Miami; 305-456-5613; electricpicklemiami.com. Admission is free until 1 a.m. with RSVP, or $10 to $20 plus fees via residentadvisor.net.
Though several theories exist, Boxing Day — the day after Christmas — was the day when servants would receive gifts, known as Christmas boxes, from their masters. Although the holiday is observed in Canada, the U.K., and other former English colonies, the 305's Electric Pickle is throwing its own version of a B-Day party filled with sick dance tunes from Anthony Naples, Diego, Uchi, and Chris Video. Think of it as a belated Christmas gift from your fave Wynwood hangout.
7. Fourth Annual Jewbilee with the Jew Tang Clan and DJ A Train. Thursday, December 24, 10 p.m. Blackbird Ordinary, 729 SW 1st Ave., Miami; 305-671-3307; blackbirdordinary.com. Admission is free. Ages 21 and up.
What's a Jewish person to do on Christmas Eve? Crash the Fourth Annual Jewbilee with Notorious Nastie and the Jew Tang Clan, of course. Going down at Blackbird Ordinary, the Brickell hotspot will be giving away free Manischewitz to all. L'chaim!
6. Mala Noche: A Nightmare Before Christmas with Dyslexic Postcards, Dino Felipe, Jaded Junkie Nurse featuring Birdman, Love Splash, Kenny Millions, Marq Iggy, Tegan, the Catacomb Crows, and more. Thursday, December 24, 9 p.m. Churchill's Pub, 5501 NE 2nd Ave., Miami; 305-757-1807; churchillspub.com. Admission is free.
Forget Noche Buena — it's gonna be una Mala Noche at Churchill's this December 24. If you're sick of all this goddamn cheer, kick off the Yuletide celebration with live tuneage from Dyslexic Postcards, Dino Felipe, and all the naughty kids of the 305, "the craziest Christmas/holiday movies all night," and lots of cheap booze. ¡Feliz Navidad!
5. Ice Billion Berg. Damage Is Done 2 Christmas Party. Friday, December 25, 11 p.m. The Hangar, 60 NE 11th St., Miami; 305-902-7697; facebook.com/Thehangar305. Tickets cost $20 plus fees via eventbrite.com.
Have a straight-up gangsta Christmas with Ice Billion Berg as the 305 rapper celebrates the 25th and the release of his latest album, Damage Is Done 2 at the Hangar. Keep it trill, y'all.
4. Bill Orcutt on the Main Stage with Chris Corsano, Silvia Kastel, Kenny Millions, Steve Bristol, Forlatt, City Medicine, and Decasyntax. Sunday, December 27, 9 p.m. Churchill's Pub, 5501 NE Second Ave., Miami; 305-757-1807; churchillspub.com.
Known for his visceral, free-improvisation noise-rock outfit Harry Pussy, Bill Orcutt is a guitar legend. "Orcutt's music never sounds the same way twice," artist and longtime fan Kevin Arrow told our sister paper New Times Broward-Palm Beach last year. "When it is successful, it sounds like an industrial blender combined with a vacuum cleaner, a rainbow, and a beehive in a lovely way." Experience the madness for yourself when the musician returns to his old stomping grounds of Churchill's and closes off 2015 with a night of noise, chaos, and moshing.
3. Sebastian Ingrosso. Part of New Year's Week at Story. Sunday, December 27, 11 p.m. Story Nightclub, 136 Collins Ave., Miami Beach; 305-538-2424; storymiami.com. Tickets cost $40 plus fees via flavorus.com. Ages 21 and up.
Get your New Year's Eve party juices flowing with Sebastian Ingrosso as the superstar DJ takes over the decks at Story. Sure, Story's NYE rager with Jamie Jones may come with a heavy price tag, but at 40 bucks, you'll get to party like a high roller for the night.
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2. Yo! Yo! Yo! Girl with Jessie Andrews, NALA, Pam Jones, Gatika, and La Chaton. Saturday, December 26, 10 p.m. Bardot, 3456 N. Miami Ave., Miami; 305-576-7750; bardotmiami.com. Ages 21 and up.
"Grind" the night away at Bardot as former-porn-star-turned-DJ Jessie Andrews takes you for a spin at 3456 N. Miami Ave. Joined by NALA, Pam Jones, Gatika, and La Chaton, these girls will have you up till dawn.
1. X-Mas Night with Oscar G and Lazaro Casanova. Presented by Humans Alike. Friday, December 25, 11 p.m. Heart Nightclub, 50 NE 11th St., Miami; 305-912-3099; heartnightclub.com. Tickets cost $20 to $30 plus fees via wantickets.com. Ages 21 and up.
Have a little heart this Christmas. No, really. After you've hung out with the fam, head over to Park West's newest night club and party it up with Oscar G and Lazaro Casanova, who recently traveled to Cuba for their first DJ gig. Merry Christmas, Miami!