Ain't no party like a weekend party.
Especially when it involves lots of booze and kickass beats for nothing more than a lowly Hamilton.
Just check out the ten best things to do under $10 this weekend, from Tony Touch and his Funkbox party at Bizerq to cassette releases from some of the 305's most talented rockers at Sweat Records and Churchill's Pub for Cassette Store Day to the Belle & Sebastian after party at Kill Your Idol with the band's own drummer and guitarist.
See also: Six Best Club Parties in Miami This Week
FUNKBOX :60sec Spot from Assassin Proof on Vimeo.
Funkbox NYC: Back In Miami. With DJ Tony Touch and Brendan Eldom spinning classic deep-house, and DJs Heron, Self Born, and Y-Not in the Hip-Hop Room. Friday, September 26, 10 p.m. Bizerq, 175 NE 36th St., Miami; facebook.com/Bizerqmiami. Free before midnight, $10 after, girls in free all night. Break open the Funkbox as Tony Touch AKA Tony Toca brings NYC's classic deep-house sounds to the 305.
See also: Five Best Concerts in Miami This Week
Space Mountain Benefit Show. With Kenny Millions, Suicide Ritual, Künt Knuckles, Sapraemia, Human Fluid Rot, and Livid Death. Saturday, September 26, 9 p.m. Space Mountain Miami, 8363 NE 2nd Ave., Miami; spacemountainmia.org. $5. Help keep Space Mountain and it's experimental shit alive with Kenny Millions, Suicide Ritual, Künt Knuckles, Sapraemia, Human Fluid Rot, and Livid Death.
See also: New Times' Concert Calendar
Choco Fuzz. With DJs Reid Waters, Manuvers, Louis Arson, and Sharpsound. Presented by Chocolate Sundays and Peachfuzz. Friday, September 26, 11 p.m. The Garret at Grand Central, 697 N. Miami Ave., Miami; 305-377-2277; grandcentralmiami.com. Free. Get ratchet with DJs Reid Waters, Manuvers, Louis Arson, and Sharpsound as the Chocolate Sundays crew takes over Peachfuzz.
See also: Miami's Five Best Nightlife Neighborhoods
Hurly-Burly Burlesque. Hurly-Burly Makes a Porno Tour. Friday, September 26, 9:30 p.m. Gramps, 176 NW 24th St., Miami; 786-752-6693; grampsbar.com. $10. Because nothing's sexier than hairy male burlesque dancers with bushy beards. Grrr.
See also: Wynwood's Five Best Bars
Woodystock Benefit. With DJ Brett Beats Bailey, Katarina Visnevska, Magical Beat, Mara Prada, Robby Hunter Band, the Booms Booms, and Fourth Dimension. Saturday, September 27, 2 to 8 p.m. Peacock Park, 2820 McFarlane Rd., Coconut Grove. Free to get in, but a $10 donation is encouraged. Help support the Woody Foundation and spread spinal chord injury awareness at the Woodystock Benefit with tuneage from the Robby Hunter Band, Fourth Dimension, and other local faves, art, food, a silent auction, and drinks from Fritz & Franz Bierhaus.
Cassette Store Day 2014. With Deaf Poets, the Grey 8s, the Gun Hoes, Plastic Pinks, Buffy, and others. Presented by Cheap Miami. Sponsored by Sweat Records, Purehoney Magazine, and Iron Forge Press. Saturday, September 27. Sweat Records, 5505 NE 2nd Ave., Miami, and Churchill's Pub, 5501 NE 2nd Ave., Miami. The show starts at 6 p.m. at Sweat Records before continuing at Churchill's Pub at 9. Free at Sweat Records and $5 at Churchill's Pub. Ages 18 and up. Embrace the magic of music on cassette with the Deaf Poets, the Grey 8s, and the rest of the music junkies at Sweat Records and Churchill's Pub for the 305's first-ever Cassette Store Day.
See also: Cassette Store Day 2014 Comes to Miami: "Tapes Are Part of Our Music Culture Again"
Pirupa. With Hugo Bianco. Presented by Blow Up Saturdays. Saturday, September 27, 11 p.m. Treehouse, 323 23rd St., Miami Beach; 305-614-4478; treehousemiami.com. Tickets cost $10 plus fees via residentadvisor.net. Get funky with Italian beat maker Pirupa as the DJ brings his techy disco house beats to Treehouse.
Speakeasy Sundays. With the Damian J. Project. Sunday, September 28, 9 p.m. Clandestino Pub, 758 Washington Ave., Miami Beach; 305-397-8946; facebook.com/clandestinopubmiami. Free. Party like it's 1921 with jazz from the Damian J. Project and Prohibition Era cocktails in the heart of SoBe at Clandestino.
See also: South Beach's Five Best Bars
Belle & Sebastian Afterparty. With a DJ set from Belle & Sebastian's Richard Colburn and Chris Geddes, Sweet Bronco, and DJ Sweetswirl. Presented by Cheap Miami and Purehoney. Sunday, September 28, 10 p.m. Kill Your Idol, 222 Española Way, Miami Beach; 305-534-1009. Free. Couldn't snag a pair of tix to see Belle & Sebastian at the Fillmore? No need to be bummed. You can still catch drummer Richard Colburn and keyboardist Chris Geddes as they rock the decks at Kill Your Idol for zero bucks.
See also: Belle & Sebastian on the Next Album and "Accepting That We're a Twee Pop Band"
Catwalk: A Night of Vogue. With Deejay Blaze, Bonnie Beats, Gooddroid, and Eva Starr. Sunday, September 28, 11 p.m. The Garret at Grand Central, 697 N. Miami Ave., Miami; 305-377-2277; grandcentralmiami.com. $5 to $10. Unleash your inner diva and get fierce on the catwalk for your shot at winning cash and booze. May the hottest biatch win.
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